Con. We could, if we were like the Apostles, and if the Matter requir’d a Miracle.  But Miracles were only given for a Time for the Conviction of the Unbelieving; there is no Need of any Thing now, but a religious Life.  And it is oftentimes a greater Happiness to be sick than to be well, and more happy to die than to live.

Innk. What do you do then?

Con. That we can; every Man according to the Talent that God has given him.  We comfort, we exhort, we warn, we reprove, and when Opportunity offers, sometimes we preach, if we any where find Pastors that are dumb:  And if we find no Opportunity of doing Good, we take Care to do no Body any Harm, either by our Manners or our Words.

Innk. I wish you would preach for us to Morrow, for it is a Holy-Day.

Con. For what Saint?

Innk. To St. Antony.

Con. He was indeed a good Man.  But how came he to have a Holiday?

Innk. I’ll tell you.  This Town abounds with Swine-Herds, by Reason of a large Wood hard by that produces Plenty of Acorns; and the People have an Opinion that St. Antony takes Charge of the Hogs, and therefore they worship him, for Fear he should grow angry, if they neglect him.

Con. I wish they would worship him as they ought to do.

Innk. How’s that?

Con. Whosoever imitates the Saints in their Lives, worships as he ought to do.

Innk. To-morrow the Town will ring again with Drinking and Dancing, Playing, Scolding and Boxing.

Con. After this Manner the Heathens once worshipped their Bacchus.  But I wonder, if this is their Way of worshipping, that St. Antony is not enraged at this Sort of Men that are more stupid than Hogs themselves.  What Sort of a Pastor have you?  A dumb one, or a wicked one?

Innk. What he is to other People, I don’t know:  But he’s a very good one to me, for he drinks all Day at my House, and no Body brings more Customers or better, to my great Advantage.  And I wonder he is not here now.

Con. We have found by Experience he is not a very good one for our Turn.

Innk. What!  Did you go to him then?

Con. We intreated him to let us lodge with him, but he chas’d us away from the Door, as if we had been Wolves, and sent us hither.

Innk. Ha, ha.  Now I understand the Matter, he would not come because he knew you were to be here.

Con. Is he a dumb one?

Innk. A dumb one!  There’s no Body is more noisy in the Stove, and he makes the Church ring again.  But I never heard him preach.  But no Need of more Words.  As far as I understand, he has made you sensible that he is none of the dumb Ones.

Con. Is he a learned Divine?

Innk. He says he is a very great Scholar; but what he knows is what he has learned in private Confession, and therefore it is not lawful to let others know what he knows.  What need many Words?  I’ll tell you in short; like People, like Priest; and the Dish, as we say, wears its own Cover.