Hugh. How do you know that?

Harry. Because they made me drink humming Ale, three Times by the Way.

Hugh. Ha, ha, ha, then they are good to you.

The FRANCISCANS, [Greek:  Ptochoplousioi], or RICH BEGGARS.

The ARGUMENT.

The Franciscans, or rich poor Persons, are not admitted into the House of a Country Parson.  Pandocheus jokes wittily upon them.  The Habit is not to be accounted odious.  The Life and Death of the Franciscans. Of the foolish Pomp of Habits.  The Habits of Monks are not in themselves evil.  What Sort of Persons Monks ought to be.  The Use of Garments is for Necessity and Decency.  What Decency is.  Whence arose the Variety of Habits and Garments among the Monks.  That there was in old Time no Superstition in the Habits.

CONRADE, a Bernardine Monk, a Parson, an Inn-Keeper and his
Wife.

Con. Hospitality becomes a Pastor.

Pars. But I am a Pastor of Sheep; I don’t love Wolves.

Con. But perhaps you don’t hate a Wench so much.  But what Harm have we done you, that you have such an Aversion to us, that you won’t so much as admit us under your Roof?  We won’t put you to the Charge of a Supper.

Pars. I’ll tell ye, because if you spy but a Hen or a Chicken in a Body’s House, I should be sure to hear of it to-Morrow in the Pulpit.  This is the Gratitude you shew for your being entertain’d.

Con. We are not all such Blabs.

Pars. Well, be what you will, I’d scarce put Confidence in St. Peter himself, if he came to me in such a Habit.

Con. If that be your Resolution, at least tell us where is an Inn.

Pars. There’s a publick Inn here in the Town.

Con. What Sign has it?

Pars. Upon a Board that hangs up, you will see a Dog thrusting his Head into a Porridge-Pot:  This is acted to the Life in the Kitchen; and a Wolf sits at the Bar.

Con. That’s an unlucky Sign.

Pars. You may e’en make your best on’t.

Ber. What Sort of a Pastor is this? we might be starv’d for him.

Con. If he feeds his Sheep no better than he feeds us, they must needs be very lean.

Ber. In a difficult Case, we had Need of good Counsel:  What shall we do?

Con. We must set a good Face on’t.

Ber. There’s little to be gotten by Modesty, in a Case of Necessity.

Con. Very right, St. Francis will be with us.

Ber. Let’s try our Fortune then.

Con. We won’t stay for our Host’s Answer at the Door, but we’ll rush directly into the Stove, and we won’t easily be gotten out again.

Ber. O impudent Trick!

Con. This is better than to lie abroad all Night, and be frozen to Death.  In the mean Time, put Bashfulness in your Wallet to Day, and take it out again to-Morrow.