Again—­you will not take it ill—­
    You are, my dear, distinctly dumpy: 
  A flowing cape it’s certain will
    Well—­not become one short and stumpy. 
  Yet since, although you are not tall,
    You wear a cape, you may take my word
  That in the mouths of one and all
    You have become a very byword.

  So this is why my love has fled—­
    If ever there should come a season
  When you shall show some sense instead
    Of such an utter lack of reason,
  If I should still be fancy free,
    Why then it’s only right to mention
  That, if you care to write to me,
    I’ll give your claims my best attention.

* * * * *

A NOTE.—­In Black and White for August 8 there is a large picture representing a group of English Dramatists, amongst whom please specially notice a figure intended for Mr. W.S.  GILBERT (it was thoughtful and kind of the artist to put the names below), who is apparently explaining to a select few why he has been compelled to come out in this strange old coat and these queer collars.  All the Dramatists look as cheerful as mutes at a funeral, their troubled expression of countenance probably arising from the knowledge that somewhere hidden away is a certain eminently unbiassed Ibsenitish critic who has been engaged to do the lot in a lump.  From this exhibition of collective wisdom turn to p. 203, and observe the single figure of a cabman, drawn by an artist who certainly has a Keene appreciation of the style of Mr. Punch’s inimitable “C.K.”

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “BURYING THE HATCHET”.

(Vide Report of the L.C. & D. Chairman’s Speech, “Times,” August 6.)]

* * * * *

A LESSON FROM THE R.N.E.

(FOR THE USE OF SAILORS PROPOSING TO JOIN THE ROYAL NAVY.)

[Illustration:  Boxing the Compass.]

Question.  I think you have been to the Royal Naval Exhibition at Chelsea.

Answer.  I have.  I was induced to make the journey by an advertising placard posted on two official boards outside the Admiralty.

Q. What was your first impression on reaching the grounds usually open to the public, but now reserved for commercial purposes?

A. That the Public were extremely benevolent to permit so long an infringement of their right of way and other privileges.

Q. After you had entered the Exhibition, what was your initial impression?

A. That a great number of the exhibits were not very appropriate advertisements.

Q. Did you see Seamen of the Royal Navy making an exhibition of themselves in the Arena?

A. I did; and could not help contrasting with the feebly-histrionic display the recent order in Paris forbidding the French soldiers to take part in theatrical representations.