7.  SEEK TO REFINE YOUR NATURE.—­It is no slander to say that many men have wives much more refined than themselves.  This is natural in the inequalities of life.  Other qualities may compensate for any defect here.  But you need have no defect in refinement.  Preserve the gentleness and refinement of your wife as a rich legacy for your children, and in so doing you will lift yourself to higher levels.

8.  BE A GENTLEMAN AS WELL AS A HUSBAND.—­The signs and bronze and callouses of toil are no indications that you are not a gentleman.  The soul of gentlemanliness is a kindly feeling toward others, that prompts one to secure their comfort.  That is why the thoughtful peasant lover is always so gentlemanly, and in his love much above himself.

9.  STAY AT HOME.—­Habitual absence during the evenings is sure to bring sorrow.  If your duty or business calls you you have the promise that you will be kept in all your ways.  But if you go out to mingle with other society, and leave your wife at home alone, or with the children and servants, know that there is no good in store for you.  She has claims upon you that you can not afford to allow to go to protest.  Reverse the case.  You sit down alone after having waited all day for your wife’s return, and think of her as reveling in gay society, and see if you can keep out all the doubts as to what takes her away.  If your home is not as attractive as you want it, you are a principal partner.  Set yourself about the work of making it attractive.

10.  TAKE YOUR WIFE WITH YOU INTO SOCIETY.—­Seclusion begets morbidness.  She needs some of the life that comes from contact with society.  She must see how other people appear and act.  It often requires an exertion for her to go out of her home, but it is good for her and for you.  She will bring back more sunshine.  It is wise to rest sometimes.  When the Arab stops for his dinner he unpacks his camel.  Treat your wife with as much consideration.

[Illustration]

[Illustration:  TIRED OF LIFE.]

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CAUSE OF FAMILY TROUBLES.

1.  MUCH BETTER TO BE ALONE.—­He who made man said it is not good for him to be alone; but it is much better to be alone, than it is to be in some kinds of company.  Many couples who felt unhappy when they were apart, have been utterly miserable when together; and scores who have been ready to go through fire and water to get married, have been willing to run the risk of fire and brimstone to get divorced.  It is by no means certain that because persons are wretched before marriage they will be happy after it.  The wretchedness of many homes, and the prevalence of immorality and divorce is a sad commentary on the evils which result from unwise marriages.

2.  UNAVOIDABLE EVILS.—­There are plenty of unavoidable evils in this world, and it is mournful to think of the multitudes who are preparing themselves for needless disappointments, and who yet have no fear, and are unwilling to be instructed, cautioned or warned.  To them the experience of mature life is of little account compared with the wisdom of ardent and enthusiastic youth.