At these vestries the Vicar is wise if he declares the curmudgeon to be “out of order,” and declines to hear him, for, legally, the business does not include any matter which does not appear upon the notice convening the meeting, signed by the Vicar and churchwardens.  This usually announces that churchwardens will be elected and the accounts produced; the latter, since church rates were abolished, is not obligatory, and only subscribers have a right to question them.  The proceedings are not legal unless three full days have elapsed since the publication of the notice on a Sunday before morning service, the following Thursday being thus the earliest day on which the meeting can take place.  It is important to remember that no churchwarden has a legal status before he has been formally admitted by the Archdeacon.

In former times, before the creation of Parish, District and County Councils, the curmudgeon, after the reaction of the winter months, became very prominent towards the time of the Easter vestry, when he would appear, having enlisted a small band of supporters, with a number of grievances relating to rates, parish officials, rights of way, footpaths, and such-like debatable subjects.  Of course, he should have been promptly squashed by the chairman, but too often an indulgent Vicar would allow him to have his fling.

Now, however, the curmudgeon can easily get himself elected upon one of the numerous councils; having mismanaged his own affairs until he has none left to manage, he appears to regard himself as a fit and proper person to mismanage the business of other people, and the brief authority which his position confers gives him a welcome opportunity of letting off superfluous steam.

Parishioners sometimes combined and elected an unpopular person to a troublesome post which nobody wanted.  Such was the office of way-warden, under whose jurisdiction came the management and repair of parish roads, superintending and paying the roadmen, and keeping the necessary records and accounts.  A market-gardener, a canny Scot, who had fallen into disfavour, had this office thrust upon him much against his will.  Once elected, the victim had no choice in the matter, and, being a very busy man, he was thoroughly annoyed.  He soon discovered a weapon wherewith to avenge the wrong—­one which his opponents had put into his hands themselves; during his year of office he restricted the road repairs to a lane adjoining his own land, leading to the railway-station, which his carts traversed many times daily.  He gave it a thorough good coat of stones, and all the available labour, as well as the cash chargeable on the rates of the parish, was in this way expended, chiefly for his own benefit, though the parish shared to the extent of the use they made of this particular piece of road.  Great was the outcry, but nothing could be done till the year of office expired, and, naturally, he was never elected again.