by my natural inclination for society, I allowed myself to be beguiled into it.  But what humiliation when any one beside me heard a flute in the far distance, while I heard nothing, or when others heard a shepherd singing, and I still heard nothing! Such things brought me to the verge of desperation, and well-nigh caused me to put an end to my life. Art! art alone, deterred me.  Ah! how could I possibly quit the world before bringing forth all that I felt it was my vocation to produce?  And thus I spared this miserable life—­so utterly miserable that any sudden change may reduce me at any moment from my best condition into the worst.  It is decreed that I must now choose Patience for my guide!  This I have done.  I hope the resolve will not fail me, steadfastly to persevere till it may please the inexorable Fates to cut the thread of my life.  Perhaps I may get better, perhaps not.  I am prepared for either.  Constrained to become a philosopher in my twenty-eighth year!  This is no slight trial, and more severe on an artist than on any one else.  God looks into my heart, he searches it, and knows that love for man and feelings of benevolence have their abode there!  Oh! ye who may one day read this, think that you have done me injustice; and let any one similarly afflicted be consoled by finding one like himself, who, in defiance of all the obstacles of nature, has done all in his power to be included in the ranks of estimable artists and men.  My brothers Carl and Johann, as soon as I am no more, if Professor Schmidt be still alive, beg him in my name to describe my malady, and to add these pages to the analysis of my disease, that at least, so far as possible, the world may be reconciled to me after my death.  I also hereby declare you both heirs of my small fortune (if so it may be called).  Share it fairly, agree together and assist each other.  You know that anything you did to give me pain has been long forgiven.  I thank you, my brother Carl in particular, for the attachment you have shown me of late.  My wish is that you may enjoy a happier life, and one more free from care than mine has been.  Recommend Virtue to your children; that alone, and not wealth, can insure happiness.  I speak from experience.  It was Virtue alone which sustained me in my misery; I have to thank her and Art for not having ended my life by suicide.  Farewell!  Love each other.  I gratefully thank all my friends, especially Prince Lichnowsky and Professor Schmidt.  I wish one of you to keep Prince L—­’s instruments; but I trust this will give rise to no dissension between you.  If you think it more beneficial, however, you have only to dispose of them.  How much I shall rejoice if I can serve you even in the grave!  So be it then!  I joyfully hasten to meet Death.  If he comes before I have had the opportunity of developing all my artistic powers, then, notwithstanding my cruel fate, he will come too early for me, and I should wish for him at a more distant period; but even then I shall be content, for his advent will release me from a state of endless suffering.  Come when he may, I shall meet him with courage.  Farewell!  Do not quite forget me, even in death:  I deserve this from you, because during my life I so often thought of you, and wished to make you happy.  Amen!