Cousin Maud.  “YES; IN BOTH CASES, YOU KNOW!”]

* * * * *

“A HAPPY NEW YEAR!”

Mr. Punch, loquitur:—­

A Happy New Year?  I should think so, my boy,
Tossed thus in the arms of your PUNCHY right cheerily,
’Midst all that a youngster should love and enjoy,
At least, you’re beginning most merrily. 
Under the Mistletoe Bough
You make a good start, anyhow. 
With a kiss from the lips that can never betray,
There’s many a girl would be greeted that way!

You’re welcome, my lad!  It is Punch’s old style
To hail with stout heart all such annual new-comers;
In winters of chill discontent he’ll still smile,
His warmth seems to turn ’em to Summers! 
Under the Mistletoe Bough
All doldrums are bosh and bow-wow. 
He doesn’t mix rue in his big New Year Bowl,
Whose aim is to cheer up the national soul.

Sursum corda!  That motto’s the best of the bunch;
Make it yours, young New Year, and ’twill keep up your pecker. 
Giving way to the Blues, you may take it from Punch,
Never helped one in heart or exchequer,
Under the Mistletoe Bough
You cannot do better, I vow,
Than make that same maxim your boyhood’s first rule,
As your very first tip in your very first school.

Don’t look like a pedagogue, do I, my lad? 
And indeed I am not an Orbilius Plagosus,
Like him who made juvenile FLACCUS so sad. 
How well the Venusian knows us! 
Under the Mistletoe Bough
He never kissed maid, but somehow
Our Dickensish Season he seemed to divine
With his fondness for friendship, and laughter, and wine.

No, boy, I don’t greatly believe in the birch,
(Though sometimes my baton must play—­on rogues’ shoulders.)
Love’s rather too apt to be left in the lurch
By Orbilian smiters and scolders. 
Under the Mistletoe Bough
A kiss is best treatment, I trow. 
A salute from the lips of your Punch you’ll not spurn,
And the young guests around you shall each take a turn.

The outlook, my lad, seems a little bit drear,
There are clouds and storm-shadows about the horizon,
But—­well, you’re a chubby and rosy Young Year
As ever your PUNCHY set eyes on. 
Under the Mistletoe Bough
You look mighty kissable—­now. 
So here goes another, for luck like, my dear,
As we wish everybody A Happy New Year!

* * * * *

OLD MORALITY’S CHRISTMAS CARD AND NEW YEAR WISHES.

This communication is designed to convey the expression of the wish that on the 25th of December and proximate days you, and those not distantly connected with you by family ties, may have enjoyed a season of Wholesome Hilarity, and that the new period of twelve months, upon which we are about to enter, may be Suffused with Happiness. (Signed) W.H.S.