Sandy Beard.—­Then you know what is to be done?

Straw Hat.—­Not I, upon my soul!

Sandy Beard.—­We wear no clubs here, but you understand me.

Straw Hat.—­What! arrest him.

Sandy Beard.—­Why to be sure; what can I mean else?

Straw Hat.—­But he has given me no provocation.

Sandy Beard.—­Now, I think he has given you the greatest provocation in the world.  Can a man commit a more heinous offence against another than to frighten him?  Ah! by my soul, it is a most unpardonable breach of something.

Straw Hat.—­Breach of something!  Ay, ay; but is’t a breach of the peace?  I have no acquaintance with this man.  I never saw him before in my life.

Sandy Beard.—­That’s no argument at all; he has the less right to take such a liberty.

Straw Hat.—­Gad, that’s true.  I grow full of anger, Sir Sandy! fire ahead!  Odds, writs and warrants!  I find a man may have a good deal of valor in him, and not know it!  But couldn’t I contrive to have a little right on my side?

Sandy Beard.—­What the devil signifies right when your courage is concerned.  Do you think Verges, or my little Dogberry ever inquired where the right lay?  No, by my soul; they drew their writs, and left the lazy justice of the peace to settle the right of it.

Straw Hat.—­Your words are a grenadier’s march to my heart!  I believe courage must be catching!  I certainly do feel a kind of valor rising as it were,—­a kind of courage, as I may say.  Odds, writs and warrants!  I’ll complain directly.

(With apologies to Sheridan.)

And the pair went off to make their complaint.

Suppose each had been given then and there the sixty cents he afterwards received and duly receipted for, would it have saved time and trouble?  Who knows? but the diversion of the afternoon would have been lost.

In a few moments an officer quite courteously—­refreshing contrast—­notified me that complaint was in process of making.

I found the chief of police with a copy of the city ordinance trying to draw some sort of a complaint that would fit the extraordinary case, for the charge was not the usual one, that the machine was going at an unlawful speed, but that a lawyer had been frightened; to find the punishment that would fit that crime was no easy task.

The ordinance is liberal,—­ten miles an hour; and the young man and his mentor had not said the speed of the automobile was greater than the law allowed, hence the dilemma of the chief; but we discussed a clause which provided that vehicles should not be driven through the streets in a manner so as to endanger public travel, and he thought the complaint would rest on that provision.

However lacking the bar of Pittsfield may be in the amenities of life, the bench is courtesy itself.  There was no court until next day; but calling at the judge’s very delightful home, which happens to be on one of the interesting old streets of the town, he said he would come down and hear the matter at two o’clock, so I could get away that afternoon.