all good itself is a means to the attainment of heaven.  Everything is bad or good in the world except art, which is a thing separate, though having good and bad results.  But the attainment of heaven is the best object to keep in view.  To that end, do the most good; and to do it, get the most money.  Therefore, as a means, money is the only thing in the world worth having, since you can most benefit humanity by it, and consequently be the most sure of going to heaven when you die.  Is that clear?”

“Perfectly,” said Nino, “provided a man is himself good.”

“It is very reprehensible to be bad,” said Benoni, with a smile.

“What a ridiculous truism!” said Nino, laughing outright.

“Very likely,” said the other.  “But I never heard any preacher, in any country, tell his congregation anything else.  And people always listen with attention.  In countries where rain is entirely unknown, it is not a truism to say that ‘when it rains it is damp.’  On the contrary, in such countries that statement would be regarded as requiring demonstration, and once demonstrated, it would be treasured and taught as an interesting scientific fact.  Now it is precisely the same with congregations of men.  They were never bad, and never can be; in fact, they doubt, in their dear innocent hearts, whether they know what a real sin is.  Consequently, they listen with interest to the statement that sin is bad, and promise themselves that if ever that piece of information should be unexpectedly needed by any of their friends, they will remember it.”

“You are a satirist, Signor Benoni,” said Nino.

“Anything you like,” returned the other, “I have been called worse names than that in my time.  So much for heaven and the prospect of it.  But a gentleman has arisen in a foreign country who says that there is no heaven, anywhere, and that no one does good except in the pursuit of pleasure here or hereafter.  But as his hereafter is nowhere, disregard it in the argument, and say that man should only do, or actually does, everything solely for the sake of pleasure here; say that pleasure is good, so long as it does not interfere with the pleasures of others, and good is pleasure.  Money may help a man to more of it, but pleasure is the thing.  Well, then, my young brother artist, what did I say?—­’money and pleasure, pleasure and money.’  The means are there; and as, of course, you are good, like everybody else, and desire pleasure, you will get to heaven hereafter, if there is such a place; and if not, you will get the next thing to it, which is a paradise on earth.”  Having reached the climax, Signor Benoni lit a cigarette, and laughed his own peculiar laugh.

Nino shuddered involuntarily at the hideous sophistry.  For Nino is a good boy, and believes very much in heaven, as well as in a couple of other places.  Benoni’s quick brown eyes saw the movement, and understood it, for he laughed longer yet, and louder.