As we advanced, I looked upon long lines of infantry and cannon marching on to battle, and I thought of all this immense preparation for wholesale slaughter of our own countrymen with horror in my heart.  Why could not this war have been avoided?  I did not know, but I felt that an overwhelming responsibility attached somewhere, for it was not likely that all possibilities of peace had been exhausted by our people.

As to the Yankees, I did not then think of them.  Their crimes and their responsibilities were their own.  I had nothing to do with them; but I was part of the South, and the Southern cause was mine, and upon me also weighed the crime of unjust war if it were unjust upon our side.

The thought of the Captain gave me great relief.  He had shown me the cause of the South; he had died for it; it could not be wrong.  I looked in the faces of the officers and men around me and read patient endurance for the right.  I was comforted.  I laughed at myself and said, Berwick, you are getting morbid; you are bilious; go to the doctor and get well of your fancies.

Then the thought of the Northern cause came to me.  Do not the Federal soldiers also think their cause just?  If not, what sort of men are they?  They must believe they are right.  And one side or the other must be wrong.  Which is it?  They are millions, and we are millions.  Millions of men are joined together to perpetrate wrong while believing that they are right?  Can such a condition be?

Even supposing that most men are led in their beliefs by other men in whose judgment they have confidence, are the leaders of either side impure?

No; if they are wrong, they are not wrong intentionally.  Men may differ conscientiously upon state policy, even upon ethics.

Then must I conclude that the North, believing itself right, is wrong in warring upon the South?  What is the North fighting for?  For union and for abolition of slavery; but primarily for union.

And is union wrong?  Not necessarily wrong.

What is the South, fighting for?  For State rights and for slavery; but principally for State rights.

And is the doctrine of State rights wrong?  Not necessarily wrong.

Then, may both North, and South be right?

The question startled me.  I had heard that idea before.  Where?  Not in the army, I was certain.  I tried hard to remember, but had to confess failure.  The result of my thought was only the suggestion that both of two seemingly opposite thoughts might possibly be true.

On that night I dreamed of my childhood.  My dream took me to a city, where I was at school under a teacher who was my friend, and at whose house I now saw him.  The man’s face was so impressed upon my mind that when I awoke I retained his features.  All day of the 9th, while we were crossing the Rapidan and continuing our march through Madison Court-House and on through Culpeper, I thought of the face of my