Mr. Punch's History of the Great War eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 266 pages of information about Mr. Punch's History of the Great War.

Mr. Punch's History of the Great War eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 266 pages of information about Mr. Punch's History of the Great War.

Elsewhere the “war of movement” has gone on with unrelenting energy according to Foch’s plan, which suggests a revision of Pope: 

  Great Foch’s law is by this rule exprest,
  Prevent the coming, speed the parting pest.

The German, true to his character of the world’s worst loser and winner, leaves behind him all manner of booby-traps, some puerile, many diabolical, which give our sappers plenty of work, cause a good many casualties, and only confirm the resolve of the victors.

According to a German paper—­the Rhenish Westphalian Gazette—­ex-criminals are being drafted into the German Army.  But the Allies propose to treat them without invidious distinction.  The Crown Prince recently observed that he had “many friends in the Entente countries”; as a matter of fact, we seem to be getting them at the rate of about twenty-five thousand a week.  The criminals in the German Navy have again been busy, adding to their previous exploits the sinking of the passenger steamer Leinster, in the Irish Channel, with heavy loss of life, the worst disaster of the kind since the torpedoing of the Lusitania.  Yet it is Germany that is the sinking ship.  Ferdinand of Bulgaria has joined the League of Abdication, and according to a Sofia telegram, will devote himself to scientific pursuits.  His only regret is that the Allies thought of it first.  Prince Friedrich Karl of Hesse says that his accession to the throne of Finland will not take place for two years, and for the first time since his emergence into publicity we find ourselves in agreement with this monarch-elect.  Ludendorff has resigned.  Austria is suing for peace; Count Tisza asks:  “Why not admit frankly that we have lost the War?” The Italians have crossed the Piave, and the Serbians have reached the Danube.  Turkey has been granted an armistice, and with the daily victories of the Allies comes the daily report that the Kaiser has abdicated.

[Illustration:  SOLDIER AND CIVILIAN

MARSHAL FOCH (to Messrs. Clemenceau, Wilson and Lloyd George):  “If you’re going up that road, gentlemen, look out for booby-traps.”]

Prince Max of Baden, the successor of Hertling in the Chancellorship, whose appointment hardly bears out the promise of popular government, has issued a pacific Manifesto which inspires an “Epitaph in anticipation”: 

  In memory of poor Prince Max,
  Who, posing as the friend of Pax,
  Yet was not noticeably lax
  In the true Teuton faith which hacks
  Its way along; forbidden tracks,
  Marks bloody dates on almanacs
  And holds all promises as wax;
  Breeding, where once we knew Hans Sachs,
  A race of monomaniacs.... 
  But now illusion’s mirror cracks,
  The radiant vision fades, the axe
  Lies at the root.  So farewell, Max!

Certain people have proclaimed their opinion that the German nation ought not to be humiliated.  When all is said, Mr. Punch saves his pity for our murdered dead.

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Mr. Punch's History of the Great War from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.