***

More bread is being eaten than ever, says the food controller.  It appears that the stuff is now eaten by itself, instead of being spread thinly on butter, as in pre-war days.

***

The largest telescope in the World has just been erected at the Mount Wilson Observatory in California.  Enthusiasts predict that the end of the War will be clearly visible through it.

***

Owing to scarcity of petrol several fire-brigades have had again to resort to horses.  In consequence people who have fires are requested to place their orders at once, as they can only be dealt with in strict rotation.

***

The prisoner who escaped from the Manchester Assize Court, after being sentenced to three years’ imprisonment, has explained that he was just pretending to be a German prisoner.

***

An awkward situation has arisen through Mr. George Bernard Shaw and Mr. George Moore having solved the Irish problem in the same week, as one or the other of them is certain to claim the credit of having his solution rejected.

***

“Blasting” for tin is being carried on in an experimental station in Cornwall.  Similar operations are said to be used in searching for sugar.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “We’ll no Gang in there, Jock.”

“For Why, DONAL’?”

“Man, it’s got an AWFU’ GERRMAN-like name, Yon.”]

* * * * *

A daughter of Lilith.

    “Gentlewoman, with tame snake, wants quiet home, suburban family,
    small garden; no others; no animals.”—­Melbourne Argus.

* * * * *

    “Mrs. ——­ wishes to recommend a boy (15) who has done well
    in the pantry.”—­Eastern Daily Press.

But would Sir Arthur Yapp approve?

* * * * *

“Will any generous soul save and buy up a young scholar, foreign (British) aristocracy, by helping him in his first struggle (legal profession)? acceptable only on returnable condition.”—­Manchester Guardian.

Before starting to save for the above purpose, we should like to know more about this scion of the “foreign (British) aristocracy.”  We don’t want to find ourselves trading with the enemy.

* * * * *

    “Canon ——­ made a strong comment on the Proposal to use the
    Ulley water for public consumption during his sermon on Sunday
    morning.”—­Provincial Paper.

The rev. gentleman cannot believe that his sermons are so dry as all that.

* * * * *

    “The undersigned begs to inform the public that a very superior
    cow will be slaughtered on the 20th evening and exposed on the
    morning of the 21st for sale.”—­Madras Mail.