I sed the paason sed ‘twer about eight shillin’.

“That’s thurd class,” he sed; an’ that thay ud aal be in Lunnon at the same time.

So I paid thurd class, an’ he shuved out sum pasteboord, an’ I put it in my pocket, an’ walked out; an’ thur wur a row o’ carridges waitin’ vor Lunnon; an’ off we went as fast as a racehoss.

I heerd sum say thay wur off to Cheltenham, Gloucester, Tewkesbury, North Wales; an’ I sed to meself, “I be on the rong road.  Dang the buttons o’ that little pasteboord seller! he warn’t a ‘safe mon’ to hev to do wi’.”

I enquired if the peeple hed much washin’ to do for the railway about here, an’ thay wanted to know what I required to know vor.

I sed because thur war such a long clothesline put up aal the way along.  An’ thay aal bust out a-larfin,’ an’ sed ’twur the tallergraph; an’ one sed as how if the Girt Western thought as how ’twould pay better, thay ud soon shet up shop, an’ take in washin’.

Never in aal me life did I go at such a rate under and awver bridges an droo holes in the ’ills.  We wur soon at Swindon, wur a lot wur at work as black as tinkers.  We aal hed to get out, an’ a chap in green clothes sed we shood hev to wait ten minits.

Thur wur a lot gwain into a room, an’ I seed they wur eatin’ and drinkin’; so I ses to meself, “I be rayther peckish, I’ll go in an’ see if I can get summut.”  So in I goes; an’ ‘twer a vine pleace, wi’ sum nation good-looking gurls a-waitin’.

“I’ll hev a half-quartern loaf,” I sed.

“We doan’t kip a baker’s shop,” she sed.  “Thur’s cakes, an’ biskits, an’ sponge cakes.”

“Hev ’e got sum good bacon, raythur vattish?” I sed.

“No, sur; but thur’s sum good poork sausingers at sixpence.”

“Hand awver the pleat, young ‘ooman,” I sed, “an’ I’ll trubble you vor the mustard, an’ salt, an’ that pleat o’ bread an’ butter, an’ I’ll set down an’ hev a bit of a snack.”

The sausingers wur very good, an’ teasted moorish aal the time; but the bread an’ butter wur so nation thin that I had to clap dree or vour pieces together to get a mouthful.  I didn’t seem to want a knife or vork, but the young ‘ooman put a white-handled knife an’ silver vork avoor me.

The pleat o’ bread an’ butter didn’t hold out vor the sausingers, so I hed another pleat o’ bread an’ butter, an’ wur getting on vine.  I seem’d to want summut to wet me whistle, an’ wur gwain to order a quart o’ ale, when I heers a whistle an’ a grunt vram a steamer, an’ out I goos; an’, begum! he wur off.

I beckuned to the chap to stop the train, wi’ me vork as I hed jest stuck into the last sausinger.  I hed clapt a good mouthful in, or I could hev hollur’d loud enough vor him to heer.  The train didn’t stop, an’ the vellers in green laughed to see I wur left in the lurch, as I tell’d them that Sairy Jane would be sure to meet the Lunnon train.  Thay sed I could go in an’ vinish the sausingers now, an’ that wur what I intended to do.