I see them even when they exist no more. My brain
is like a closet full of pictures, which should move
and set themselves in order at the master’s
pleasure. Painters, with all their art and skill,
never attain but an imperfect likeness; whereas the
pictures I have in my head are so faithful, that it
is by consulting them I perceive all the defects of
those made by painters, and correct them within myself.
Now, do these images, more like their original than
the masterpieces of the art of painting, imprint themselves
in my head without any art? Is my brain a book,
all the characters of which have ranged themselves
of their own accord? If there be any art in
the case, it does not proceed from me. For I
find within me that collection of images without having
ever so much as thought either to imprint them, or
set them in order. Moreover, all these images
either appear or retire as I please, without any confusion.
I call them back, and they return; I dismiss them,
and they sink I know not where. They either
assemble or separate, as I please. But I neither
know where they lie, nor what they are. Nevertheless
I find them always ready. The agitation of so
many images, old and new, that revive, join, or separate,
never disturbs a certain order that is amongst them.
If some of them do not appear at the first summons,
at least I am certain they are not far off. They
may lurk in some deep corner, but I am not totally
ignorant of them as I am of things I never knew; for,
on the contrary, I know confusedly what I look for.
If any other image offers itself in the room of that
I called for, I immediately dismiss it, telling it,
“It is not you I have occasion for.”
But, then, where lie objects half-forgotten?
They are present within me, since I look for them there,
and find them at last. Again, in what manner
are they there, since I look for them a long while
in vain? What becomes of them? “I
am no more,” says St. Augustin, “what
I was when I had the thoughts I cannot find again.
I know not,” continues that father, “either
how it comes to pass that I am thus withdrawn from
and deprived of myself, or how I am afterwards brought
back and restored to myself. I am, as it were,
another man, and carried to another place, when I
look for, and do not find, what I had trusted to my
memory. In such a case we cannot reach, and
are, in a manner, strangers remote from ourselves.
Nor do we come at us but when we find what we are
in quest of. But where is it we look for but
within us? Or what is it we look for but ourselves?
. . . So unfathomable a difficulty astonishes
us!” I distinctly remember I have known what
I do not know at present. I remember my very
oblivion. I call to mind the pictures or images
of every person in every period of life wherein I
have seen them formerly, so that the same person passes
several times in my head. At first, I see one
a child, then a young, and afterwards an old, man.
I place wrinkles in the same face in which, on the


