“Where are you all going?” I demanded.

“To the Wrightery,” said Phil.

“Is it a party?”

“It’s a gathering.”

“Am I included?”

“If you’ll—­”

“Not on any account,” I declared firmly.  It had just occurred to me why the Bonnie Lassie had centered her gaze upon my features.  “Follow your indecent noses as far as you like.  I stay.”

Still lost in meditation, I may have dozed on my bench, when heavy, measured footsteps aroused me.  I looked up to see Terry the Cop, guardian of our peace, arbiter of differences, conservator of our morals.  I peered at him with anxiety.

“Terry,” I inquired, “how is your nose?”

“Keen, Dominie,” said Terry.  He sniffed the air.  “Don’t you detect the smell of illegal alcohol?”

“I can’t say I do.”

“It’s very plain,” declared the officer wriggling his nasal organ which, I was vastly relieved to observe, retained its original hue.  “Wouldn’t you say, Dominie, it comes from yonder cellar?”

“Barbran’s cellar?

“I am informed that a circle of dangerous char-ackters with green noses gather there and drink cider containing more than two-seventy-five per cent of apple juice.  I’m about to pull the place.”

“For Heaven’s sake, Terry; don’t do that!  You’ll scare—­”

“Whisht, Dominie!” interrupted Terry with an elaborate wink.  “There’ll be no surprise, except maybe to the Judge in the morning.  You better drop in at the court.”

Of the round-up I have no details, except that it seemed to be quietly conducted.  The case was called the next day, before Magistrate Wolf Tone Hanrahan, known as the “Human Judge.”  Besides being human, his Honor is, as may be inferred from his name, somewhat Irish.  He heard the evidence, tested the sample, announced his intention of coming around that evening for some more, and honorably discharged Barbran.

“And what about these min?” he inquired, gazing upon the dauntless six.

“Dangerous suspects, Yeronner,” said Terry the Cop.

“They look mild as goat’s milk to me,” returned the Magistrate, “though now I get me eye on the rid-hidded wan [with a friendly wink at the Little Red Doctor] I reckonize him as a desprit charackter that’d save your life as soon as look at ye.  What way are they dang’rous?”

“When apprehended,” replied Terry, looking covertly about to see that the reporters were within hearing distance, “their noses were painted green.”

“Is this true?” asked the Magistrate of the six.

“It is, your Honor,” they replied.

“An’, why not!” demanded the Human Judge hotly. “’Tis a glorious color!  Erin go bragh!  Off’cer, ye’ve exceeded yer jooty.  D’ ye think this is downtrodden an’ sufferin’ Oireland an’ yerself the tyrant Gineral French?  Let ’em paint their noses anny color they loike; but green for preference.  I’m tellin’ ye, this is the land of freedom an’ equality, an’ ivery citizen thereof is entitled to life, liberty, and the purshoot of happiness, an’ a man’s nose is his castle, an’ don’t ye fergit it.  Dis-charrrrged!  Go an’ sin no more.  I mane, let the good worruk go awn!”