Chapter 9: The Rules Summary and Analysis

In this comical chapter, Manson sets out his tongue-in-cheek rules for daily life. Under "drug rules," Manson considers you and addict if, among other factors, you always pay for your drugs; you do drugs before 6 pm and after 6 am; you tell anybody about your childhood while you're on drugs; and, you're a child actor.

Under "homosexuality rules," Manson proclaims you are gay if, among other things, you've ever worn a beret. Other signs include if your name is Richard and you go by Dick, if you've spent more than a week on South Beach, and if you're a male model.

Under "cheating rules," Manson includes rules that have huge loopholes such as you are not cheating if it was part of a public performance. Also, if it's somebody's birthday, if you're doing it to help your career...