Accepting Differences of Others

The novel argues that a crucial part of getting along in the world deals with learning to accept other people for who they are rather than trying to change them. Nan must accept Lily’s differences. Lily must accept Nan’s differences. Lily, Charles, and Nan must accept the ways in which Will is different.

Nan has difficulty accepting Lily because Nan is unfamiliar with the grief Lily has suffered and Nan is accustomed to people liking her. At the small Southern church where Nan’s father preached, everyone loved Nan. She was well-liked in high school and college. Nan approaches her meeting with Lily with no doubt that she and Lily will be close friends. For that reason, she is shocked when Lily appears snobbish and hateful. Later, after Nan begins to get to know Lily, she realizes how much the death...