Al Roosten Summary

Al Roosten is a businessman participating in a charity auction to fight drug use and abuse. As he waits his turn to go on stage, he compares himself to Larry Donfrey. He wonders if the voters will believe that Larry is better looking than him. He decides that since he doesn't like guys romantically, he isn't the proper person to make the decision if Larry is cuter than him or not.

During Larry's turn on the runway, Al hears whoops and cheers. He wonders it he will get whoops and cheers. When he steps out, Al feels as if the people want to laugh. He hears one pity whoop, which he acknowledges with a half wave. The crowd realizes how terrified he is and the remainder of the crowd cheers. Al doesn't realize the cheers are mercy cheers and flexes for...