Chapter Nine, 1981, Surviving Infatuation and Isolation Summary and Analysis

In 1981, White sometimes discussed his homosexuality with friends Philip and Janet Yancey, who encouraged him. However, one day White entered a gay bar near their house and met a young man named Tom Montgomery, who White immediately fell in love with. They went to a hotel and had sex, with White's body responding immediately to Tom's. White knew it was adultery but he could not handle repressing his sensual needs any longer. After having sex, White felt relaxed and peaceful; it was as if Tom's arms were the arms of God. He could finally be himself and did not feel awkward.

A social tempest quickly followed when White told Lyla what was happening. They had many fights and saw many counselors, all of whom encouraged them to separate. White felt terrible...