Summary

Chapter 1

The novel opens on the fifth week of classes at Euston University in Vermont. Dr. Ted Swenson, a creative writing professor, begins class. He has only 9 students in his class and his attempts at humor go right over their heads. It is, in fact, slightly inappropriate (he wonders out loud why the manuscripts he's been evaluating seem to all be focusing on people having sex with animals). At age 47, Ted finds himself watching his students as they begin working and wondering how time could have so rapidly passed him by.

The school has been implementing many new protocols, all designed to keep the college from entertaining numerous lawsuits. As a result, faculty have been subjected to all sorts of new meetings, outlining environmental safety, blood borne pathogens, and emergency procedures in case of a terrorist attack. Most of the buildings are being...