I Never Promised You a Rose Garden Chapter 10
When Jacob finds out that Deborah is on the Disturbed ward, it bothers him, but Esther placates him for a while longer, and Suzy is angry because even when Deborah's not present, she's still holding her parents' full attention. Esther goes to visit the hospital, hoping to see Deborah, but she isn't allowed to. When she gets home, she lies to Jacob to make him feel better. He insists that the next time she goes to the hospital, he's going with her and he's going to see Deborah.
Meanwhile Deborah and Carla plan a scheme for Deborah to get forbidden paper and a pencil to sketch Carla's portrait. Uniting against the ward attendants to break the rules gives them companionship and camaraderie that they both need.
In a session, Deborah goes on and on to Dr. Fried about the poisonous of her essence, of the substance that makes her who she is. Deborah claims that it infects others with her madness, and she fears that she has destroyed Suzy with it. Deborah admits that when her younger sister was born, Deborah hated her. She even went so far as to try to throw her out the window, but her mother caught her. Nothing else was ever said about the incident in her family, but Deborah knows that Suzy is going to be sick, too, because of her contact with Deborah. Deborah explains that the sickness is a volcano burning inside and the symptoms of the sickness are what camouflages the illness itself.