The Portable Dorothy Parker Test | Final Test - Easy

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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. According to "From a Letter From Lesbia," why should you not take a poet as a lover?
(a) All of them are strange.
(b) They are all too serious.
(c) Poets are unreliable.
(d) All poets are poor.

2. Why does Gerald Cruger avoid looking at Miss Wilmarth in the story "Horsie"?
(a) He thinks she might think he is making a pass at her.
(b) He is afraid that she might ask to stay on longer.
(c) He feels guilty for all of the awful things he has said about her.
(d) He expects her to toss her head and whinny.

3. What does the narrator of "Requiescat" pray "will not rise again"?
(a) The sun.
(b) The moon.
(c) The daisies.
(d) Her love.

4. Hazel Morse prides herself most on what characteristic?
(a) Her large bust.
(b) Her deep blue eyes.
(c) Her small feet.
(d) Her tiny waist.

5. Why does Hazel purchase the bottles of veronal?
(a) To help her sleep at night.
(b) To help her lose weight.
(c) To help her commit suicide.
(d) To help her deal with the pains in her back.

6. What gift does the narrator give to the six soldiers as they leave?
(a) Twenty dollars.
(b) The rest of her pack of cigarettes.
(c) A flask of whiskey.
(d) A cigarette lighter.

7. In the poem "The Danger of Writing Defiant Verse," what does the narrator realize about her new lover?
(a) He is silly.
(b) He does not actually exist.
(c) He is cheating on her.
(d) He does not truly love her.

8. What important lesson has "The Little Old Lady in Lavender Silk" learned from life?
(a) Never trust a younger man.
(b) Education is more important than any other pleasure.
(c) Always keep company with people of your own social status.
(d) There is nothing more fun than a man.

9. What excuse does the narrator suggest would have been better to explain Mona's "illness"?
(a) A nervous condition.
(b) Pneumonia.
(c) Influenza or ptomaine poisoning.
(d) A broken heart.

10. What disturbing news does the narrator give to Mona?
(a) Mona's doctor has been telling everyone about her "condition."
(b) Garry has moved away to Chicago and does not plan to return.
(c) Garry is not out of town, but has been seen around town with another woman.
(d) Mona will never find a man who will want to marry her.

11. According to the poem " Two-Volume Novel," what has stopped the sun and moon from shining?
(a) The narrator's love interest does not love her back.
(b) The end of the world has arrived.
(c) The dead of winter has cast a cloud over everything.
(d) The narrator has reached the end of her life.

12. What complaint does the narrator of "Bohemia" express about sculptors and singers?
(a) They tell everyone about their affairs.
(b) They only think about sex.
(c) They can never say no.
(d) They never know anything.

13. According to "Rhyme Against the Living," who is lucky?
(a) The dead.
(b) The living.
(c) Young lovers.
(d) Widows.

14. What does Mona say is wrong with her?
(a) She has influenza.
(b) She has a broken heart.
(c) She has ptomaine poisoning.
(d) It is just her nerves.

15. How do Ed and Hazel's other friends respond when Hazel is feeling sad?
(a) They tell her to cheer up and stop being a spoil sport.
(b) They never know when she is sad because she hides her emotions.
(c) They listen to her troubles and lend her emotional support.
(d) They suggest that she should she a therapist.

Short Answer Questions

1. What does the girl in "The Last Tea" think about girls who drink alcohol.

2. How does Herbie react when Hazel begins to drink Scotch?

3. Why does the narrator refuse to count sheep?

4. According to the poem "Solace," why do people not worry over the broken stem of a rose?

5. What does Hazel ask Nettie to do for her after her suicide attempt?

(see the answer keys)

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