The Long Dark Tea-time of the Soul Test | Final Test - Easy

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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What is sitting next to Odin's bed the afternoon following his return to Woodshead?
(a) A Stanley hammer.
(b) A gold class ring.
(c) An onion ring.
(d) A newspaper.

2. How does Kate describe Thor's eyes?
(a) As oval.
(b) As glacial.
(c) As tired.
(d) As jade-like.

3. How does the author characterize the Eighties?
(a) As materialistic.
(b) As meat-eating.
(c) As utopian.
(d) As brilliant.

4. What does the nurse say is rumored of Howard Bell?
(a) That he is a saint.
(b) That he eats worms every day.
(c) That he has eyes in the back of his head.
(d) That he is in a pact with the devil.

5. Why does Thor go to Wales to count the things he has to count?
(a) Records.
(b) Art.
(c) Superstition.
(d) Penance.

6. What has he been counting in Wales?
(a) Picnic tables.
(b) People.
(c) Stones.
(d) Seagulls.

7. What does the green-eyed monster do to the stable master at Valhalla?
(a) Beheads him.
(b) Poisons him.
(c) Eats him.
(d) Hires him.

8. As Dirk turns through Islington, he begins the long haul past _____.
(a) Pet groomers and hair salons.
(b) Laundromats and car repair shops.
(c) Pizza restaurants and estate agents.
(d) Hamburger joints and vision centers.

9. Where does the eagle injure Dirk as he tries to escape to get some cigarettes?
(a) On his leg.
(b) On his nose.
(c) On his right ear.
(d) On his arm.

10. What part of London does Dirk say is antique buildings being ripped apart?
(a) Lower Street.
(b) The East End.
(c) Upper Street.
(d) The West End.

11. What did Odin sacrifice one of his own eyes for?
(a) Survival.
(b) Wisdom.
(c) A good steak.
(d) Peace.

12. What has happened to many of the gods?
(a) They have transmutated into animals.
(b) They have succumbed to alcoholism.
(c) They have retired with a pension.
(d) They have found jobs in other dimensions.

13. What does Thor tell Odin he could not steal from his son?
(a) His life.
(b) His love.
(c) His power.
(d) His dreams.

14. According to Odin, very little attention was given to _____ at Valhalla.
(a) Wine.
(b) Laundry.
(c) Weapon maintenance.
(d) Steak.

15. Who sends a constant barrage of paradoxical notices to Dirk in the mail?
(a) Coca-Cola.
(b) The government.
(c) American Express.
(d) His brother.

Short Answer Questions

1. What creatures crouch beneath the foul sky outside the gates of Valhalla?

2. What does Neil say he definitively won't work with?

3. What is the name of the wife of the lawyer that Dirk hits with his car?

4. What is the neroli oil Kate puts in Thor's bath distilled from?

5. What is in the lip preserver Kate puts in Thor's bath?

(see the answer keys)

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