1. Sedaris first compares his speech therapist to
(a) The devil.
(b) A football player.
(c) A government agent.
(d) A supermodel.
2. The question "Which do you like better, State or Carolina?" refers to
(a) University football teams.
(b) Two local towns.
(c) Two different titles for one football team.
(d) Contenders for the Superbowl title.
3. Miss Sampson asks the previous question in order to
(a) Trick Sedaris into revealing his disdain for sports.
(b) Get Sedaris talking so she might hear his lisp.
(c) Provoke an argument about football.
(d) Determine whether or not she will like Sedaris.
4. Miss Sampson attempts to illustrate Sedaris' speech problem by
(a) Insisting Sedaris only use 's' words.
(b) Over enunciating her 's' sounds.
(c) Asking the rest of the class to comment on it.
(d) Making fun of his lisp at every opportunity.
5. Sedaris attempts to hide his lisp by
(a) Mispronouncing all his words.
(b) Practicing his s-words at home.
(c) Learning as many s-free words as possible.
(d) Refusing to speak during therapy.
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