If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits? Test | Final Test - Easy

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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What does Bombeck worry her son will never do?
(a) Find a career that makes him happy.
(b) Leave their town.
(c) Marry.
(d) Graduate college.

2. What did Bombeck's son believe would happen if he followed his mother's wishes in "Search and Seizure Rights in the Laundry Room?"
(a) He would never be able to find his socks again.
(b) His dresser would not close.
(c) His clean clothes would get mixed up with his dirty clothes.
(d) His closet might explode.

3. What did Bombeck cite as being a problem with "The Star Spangled Banner?"
(a) Too many people do not know the words.
(b) Too many people deviate from the melody when singing it before a ballgame.
(c) The melody could hurt nonprofessional singers.
(d) The song is too long.

4. What was Bombeck's example of a typical topic on a game show?
(a) Fuel formula.
(b) Current Senators.
(c) Brechtian theater.
(d) Pop psychology.

5. What Washington bureaucrat did Bombeck decide she wanted to meeting in "Constitutionality of Drive-in Windows?"
(a) The one who decides the cost of shipping parcels.
(b) The one who decided post offices should always be located far away from populated areas.
(c) The designer of the drive-up mailboxes.
(d) The designer of the stamps.

6. What did Bombeck believe a baby should be allowed to decide?
(a) The baby should be allowed to decide whether they want to be dressed up all of the time.
(b) The baby should be allowed to decide whether they want to be passed around at parties.
(c) The baby should be allowed to decide whether to eat baby food.
(d) The baby should be allowed to decide whether they want a playdate.

7. What was Bombeck unable to find when her son needed a particular object to return to school?
(a) Paper.
(b) His birth certificate.
(c) His health card.
(d) Crayons.

8. In "Joe Carter's Jubilance and Excitement Seminar," how many aspects of decorum were listed?
(a) Five.
(b) Six.
(c) Three.
(d) Four.

9. In "Kissing By Mutual Ratification," what is not one of the items listed as object for which a person should watch?
(a) Toothpicks.
(b) Earrings.
(c) Staples.
(d) Pins.

10. For what reasons would one call legal aid on an exist ramp?
(a) To remove anyone who got sick in teh car.
(b) To silence the children.
(c) To dissolve a family relationship.
(d) To sue backseat drivers.

11. In Bombeck's son's example of his mother's lessons in logic, what would prevent a child from not being allowed to go to the store?
(a) Getting a detention from the principal.
(b) Wearing dirty clothes from the day before.
(c) Getting anything lower than a B on their report cards.
(d) Hurting themselves if they fall off their bikes.

12. What would amaze Bombeck about the game shows?
(a) The game show host's cheesiness.
(b) The women's knowledge.
(c) The uniform beauty of the game show assistants.
(d) The excitement of the winners.

13. For how many meals did Bombeck's son claim to have capacity?
(a) Seven.
(b) Six.
(c) Eight.
(d) Five.

14. Who was Bombeck's son bringing home at the end of "How to Speak Child Fluently?"
(a) Mooching best friend.
(b) New girlfriend.
(c) Surfer friends.
(d) Football teammates.

15. After her son moves out, into what does Bombeck transform his bedroom?
(a) A storage space.
(b) A guest room.
(c) A television room.
(d) An exercise room.

Short Answer Questions

1. For what reasons did Bombeck tear a strip of wallpaper down in "Warning: Families May Be Dangerous To Your Health?"

2. Why did Bombeck dislike several fashion trends?

3. For what offense would Bombeck not be convicted, according to "Register Camera Nuts?"

4. What was Jackie's husband's response when asked what the most embarrassing moment of their wedding had been?

5. In "Warning: Families May Be Dangerous To Your Health," what did Bombeck's son need to return to school?

(see the answer keys)

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