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Ralph Parker

This is the narrator of A FISTFUL OF FIG NEWTONS who remains unnamed throughout most of the book.

Schwartz

This is one of the narrator's childhood friends who goes to Warren G. Harding Middle School with him and to Camp Nobba-WaWa-Nockee, where he is a member of Mole Lodge along with the narrator.

Schuyler Umbaugh

He is an intellectual at the Midwestern college the narrator attends and gets some football team members and the narrator into a laxative-eating contest.

Goldberg

He is known throughout the narrator's dorm for his piggish eating.

Big Al Dagellio

He is a dim-witted star football player at the Midwestern college attended by the narrator.

Flick

He is one of the narrator's childhood friends who goes to Warren G. Harding Middle School and comes up with Skunk's nickname, comparing his vomit to a skunk's defense.

Kissel

He makes a shoulder holster in...

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