Summary:
In Sherwood Anderson's "I Want to Know Why", the narrator's love of horses grew from his boyhood wonder into a total love affair, so did his expectations. In learning the harsh truth, the narrator was forced to face the fact that his ideal of the perfect trainer was far better than the actual reality and that they are just men after all.
I Want to Know Why
The narrator is so awestruck with horses and horseracing that his throat hurts when he sees a really promising horse and he is certain that he "can tell a winner" (4). He considers his aching throat as a sure fire sign that the horse is a champion but in reality it is a symbol of much more. The narrator's throat hurting can be likened to the feeling of pride that swells up in a parent as her child takes her first step or graduates from high school. In addition, just like a parent who thinks her child can do no wrong, the narrator's vision of the perfect trainer is shattered when he witnesses the grim reality of the trainer's life.
The feeling of pride that washes over the narrator as he sees these horses is because he feels that "horse racing is in every breath you breathe" (2). Within the community he lives, everyone "who is anyone at all, likes horses" (1). Horses are in his blood. They consume his every thought and he is "just crazy about thoroughbred horses" (3). It is only natural for him to take some ownership of the horses that he spends so much time studying and watching. As part of his ownership, his sense of pride is overwhelming at times.
As his pride for the horses grows, the narrator almost begins a love affair with the horses. "They're beautiful. There isn't anything so lovely and clean and full of spunk as some race horses" (3). He is totally smitten with the whole idea of the horses and even compares one, Sunstreak, to "a girl you think about but never see" (5). There is no mention of a girlfriend in the story but the language he uses to describe the horses is sensual and erotic at times. "He is hard all over and lovely too. When you look at his head you want to kiss him" (5).
As the story progresses, the narrator's love affair intensifies. He begins to not only love the horse but his trainer, Jerry Tillford, as well and then "there wasn't anything in the world but the man and the horse" (6) and the narrator. When he switches his thoughts to the trainer he personalizes his feelings, and "liked him that afternoon even more than [he] ever liked [his] own father" (6). Those are very strong emotions. He had idolized this man. Therefore, when he follows him and observes him with that "bad woman" (7), his ideal of Jerry is destroyed. Until that time, the narrator had lived with the belief that trainers where these godlike men who were able to train these heavenly animals.
As the narrator's love of horses grew from his boyhood wonder into a total love affair, so did his expectations. In learning the harsh truth, the narrator was forced to face the fact that his ideal of the perfect trainer was far better than the actual reality and that they are just men after all. With that in mind, the honeymoon was over and "it spoils looking at horses and smelling things... and everything" (7).
Works Cited
Anderson, Sherwood. "I Want to Know Why." The Norton Anthology of Short Fiction. Ed. R.V. Cassill, and Richard Bausch. New York, NY: W.W. Norton & Company, 2000. 1-7.
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