OF HOW THE CURATE AND THE BARBER PROCEEDED WITH THEIR SCHEME; TOGETHER
WITH OTHER MATTERS WORTHY OF RECORD IN THIS GREAT HISTORY
The curate’s plan did not seem a bad one to
the barber, but on the contrary so good that they
immediately set about putting it in execution.
They begged a petticoat and hood of the landlady, leaving
her in pledge a new cassock of the curate’s;
and the barber made a beard out of a grey-brown or
red ox-tail in which the landlord used to stick his
comb. The landlady asked them what they wanted
these things for, and the curate told her in a few
words about the madness of Don Quixote, and how this
disguise was intended to get him away from the mountain
where he then was. The landlord and landlady
immediately came to the conclusion that the madman
was their guest, the balsam man and master of the blanketed
squire, and they told the curate all that had passed
between him and them, not omitting what Sancho had
been so silent about. Finally the landlady dressed
up the curate in a style that left nothing to be desired;
she put on him a cloth petticoat with black velvet
stripes a palm broad, all slashed, and a bodice of
green velvet set off by a binding of white satin,
which as well as the petticoat must have been made
in the time of king Wamba. The curate would not
let them hood him, but put on his head a little quilted
linen cap which he used for a night-cap, and bound
his forehead with a strip of black silk, while with
another he made a mask with which he concealed his
beard and face very well. He then put on his
hat, which was broad enough to serve him for an umbrella,
and enveloping himself in his cloak seated himself
woman-fashion on his mule, while the barber mounted
his with a beard down to the waist of mingled red
and white, for it was, as has been said, the tail
of a clay-red ox.
They took leave of all, and of the good Maritornes,
who, sinner as she was, promised to pray a rosary
of prayers that God might grant them success in such
an arduous and Christian undertaking as that they had
in hand. But hardly had he sallied forth from
the inn when it struck the curate that he was doing
wrong in rigging himself out in that fashion, as it
was an indecorous thing for a priest to dress himself
that way even though much might depend upon it; and
saying so to the barber he begged him to change dresses,
as it was fitter he should be the distressed damsel,
while he himself would play the squire’s part,
which would be less derogatory to his dignity; otherwise
he was resolved to have nothing more to do with the
matter, and let the devil take Don Quixote. Just
at this moment Sancho came up, and on seeing the pair
in such a costume he was unable to restrain his laughter;
the barber, however, agreed to do as the curate wished,
and, altering their plan, the curate went on to instruct
him how to play his part and what to say to Don Quixote
