’My dear Mortimer, one would think the schoolmaster
had left behind him a catechizing infection.
You are ruffled by the want of another cigar.
Take one of these, I entreat. Light it at mine,
which is in perfect order. So! Now do me
the justice to observe that I am doing all I can towards
self-improvement, and that you have a light thrown
on those household implements which, when you only
saw them as in a glass darkly, you were hastily—I
must say hastily—inclined to depreciate.
Sensible of my deficiencies, I have surrounded myself
with moral influences expressly meant to promote the
formation of the domestic virtues. To those influences,
and to the improving society of my friend from boyhood,
commend me with your best wishes.’
‘Ah, Eugene!’ said Lightwood, affectionately,
now standing near him, so that they both stood in
one little cloud of smoke; ’I would that you
answered my three questions! What is to come of
it? What are you doing? Where are you going?’
‘And my dear Mortimer,’ returned Eugene,
lightly fanning away the smoke with his hand for the
better exposition of his frankness of face and manner,
’believe me, I would answer them instantly if
I could. But to enable me to do so, I must first
have found out the troublesome conundrum long abandoned.
Here it is. Eugene Wrayburn.’ Tapping
his forehead and breast. ’Riddle-me, riddle-me-ree,
perhaps you can’t tell me what this may be?—No,
upon my life I can’t. I give it up!’
IN WHICH A FRIENDLY MOVE IS ORIGINATED
The arrangement between Mr Boffin and his literary
man, Mr Silas Wegg, so far altered with the altered
habits of Mr Boffin’s life, as that the Roman
Empire usually declined in the morning and in the eminently
aristocratic family mansion, rather than in the evening,
as of yore, and in Boffin’s Bower. There
were occasions, however, when Mr Boffin, seeking a
brief refuge from the blandishments of fashion, would
present himself at the Bower after dark, to anticipate
the next sallying forth of Wegg, and would there,
on the old settle, pursue the downward fortunes of
those enervated and corrupted masters of the world
who were by this time on their last legs. If
Wegg had been worse paid for his office, or better
qualified to discharge it, he would have considered
these visits complimentary and agreeable; but, holding
the position of a handsomely-remunerated humbug, he
resented them. This was quite according to rule,
for the incompetent servant, by whomsoever employed,
is always against his employer. Even those born
governors, noble and right honourable creatures, who
have been the most imbecile in high places, have uniformly
shown themselves the most opposed (sometimes in belying
distrust, sometimes in vapid insolence) to their
employer. What is in such wise true of the public
master and servant, is equally true of the private
master and servant all the world over.
