’There is my past and my present wasted life.
There is the desolation of my heart and my soul.
There is my peace; there is my despair. Stamp
them into the dust; so that you take me, were it even
mortally hating me!’
The frightful vehemence of the man, now reaching its
full height, so additionally terrifies her as to break
the spell that has held her to the spot. She
swiftly moves towards the porch; but in an instant
he is at her side, and speaking in her ear.
’Rosa, I am self-repressed again. I am
walking calmly beside you to the house. I shall
wait for some encouragement and hope. I shall
not strike too soon. Give me a sign that you
attend to me.’
She slightly and constrainedly moves her hand.
’Not a word of this to any one, or it will bring
down the blow, as certainly as night follows day.
Another sign that you attend to me.’
She moves her hand once more.
’I love you, love you, love you! If you
were to cast me off now— but you will not—you
would never be rid of me. No one should come
between us. I would pursue you to the death.’
The handmaid coming out to open the gate for him,
he quietly pulls off his hat as a parting salute,
and goes away with no greater show of agitation than
is visible in the effigy of Mr. Sapsea’s father
opposite. Rosa faints in going up-stairs, and
is carefully carried to her room and laid down on
her bed. A thunderstorm is coming on, the maids
say, and the hot and stifling air has overset the pretty
dear: no wonder; they have felt their own knees
all of a tremble all day long.
Rosa no sooner came to herself than the whole of the
late interview was before her. It even seemed
as if it had pursued her into her insensibility, and
she had not had a moment’s unconsciousness of
it. What to do, she was at a frightened loss
to know: the only one clear thought in her mind
was, that she must fly from this terrible man.
But where could she take refuge, and how could she
go? She had never breathed her dread of him
to any one but Helena. If she went to Helena,
and told her what had passed, that very act might bring
down the irreparable mischief that he threatened he
had the power, and that she knew he had the will,
to do. The more fearful he appeared to her excited
memory and imagination, the more alarming her responsibility
appeared; seeing that a slight mistake on her part,
either in action or delay, might let his malevolence
loose on Helena’s brother.
