The following sections of this BookRags Literature Study Guide is offprint from Gale's For Students Series: Presenting Analysis, Context, and Criticism on Commonly Studied Works: Introduction, Author Biography, Plot Summary, Characters, Themes, Style, Historical Context, Critical Overview, Criticism and Critical Essays, Media Adaptations, Topics for Further Study, Compare & Contrast, What Do I Read Next?, For Further Study, and Sources.
(c)1998-2002; (c)2002 by Gale. Gale is an imprint of The Gale Group, Inc., a division of Thomson Learning, Inc. Gale and Design and Thomson Learning are trademarks used herein under license.
The following sections, if they exist, are offprint from Beacham's Encyclopedia of Popular Fiction: "Social Concerns", "Thematic Overview", "Techniques", "Literary Precedents", "Key Questions", "Related Titles", "Adaptations", "Related Web Sites". (c)1994-2005, by Walton Beacham.
The following sections, if they exist, are offprint from Beacham's Guide to Literature for Young Adults: "About the Author", "Overview", "Setting", "Literary Qualities", "Social Sensitivity", "Topics for Discussion", "Ideas for Reports and Papers". (c)1994-2005, by Walton Beacham.
All other sections in this Literature Study Guide are owned and copyrighted by BookRags, Inc.
| Table of Contents | |
| Section | Page |
| Start of eBook | 1 |
| THE COBBLER | 1 |
| ETEXT EDITOR’S BOOKMARKS: | 3 |
| Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) | 4 |
| (Three Pages) | 6 |
We’re told, that once a cobbler, Blase by name;
A wife had got, whose charms so high in fame;
But as it happened, that their cash was spent,
The honest couple to a neighbour went,
A corn-factor by trade, not overwise
To whom they stated facts without disguise;
And begged, with falt’ring voice denoting care,
That he, of wheat, would half a measure spare,
Upon their note, which readily he gave,
And all advantages desired to wave.
Thetime for payment came; the money used;
The
cash our factor would not be refused;
Of
writs he talked, attorneys, and distress;
The
reason:—heav’n can tell, and you may
guess;
In
short, ’twas clear our gay gallant desired,
To
cheer the wife, whose beauty all admired.
Saidhe, what anxiously I wish to get,
You’ve
plenty stored, and never wanted yet;
You
surely know my meaning?—Yes, she cried;
I’ll
turn it in my mind, and we’ll decide
How
best to act. Away she quickly flew,
And
Blase informed, what Ninny had in view.
Zounds!
said the cobbler, we must see, my dear,
To
hook this little sum:—the way is clear;
No
risk I’m confident; for prithee run
And
tell him I’ve a journey just begun;
That
he may hither come and have his will;
But
’ere he touch thy lips, demand the bill;
He’ll
not refuse the boon I’m very sure;
Meantime,
myself I’ll hide and all secure.
The
note obtained, cough loudly, strong, and clear;
Twice
let it be, that I may plainly hear;
Then
forth I’ll sally from my lurking place,
And,
spite of folly’s frowns, prevent disgrace.
The,
plot succeeded as the pair desired;
The
cobbler laughed, and all his scheme admired:
A
purse-proud cit thereon observed and swore;
’Twere
better to have coughed when all was o’er;
Then
you, all three, would have enjoyed your wish,
And
been in future all as mute as fish.
Oh!
sir, replied the cobbler’s wife at ease,
Do
you suppose that use can hope to please,
And
like your ladies full of sense appear?
(For
two were seated with his wedded dear;)
Perhaps
my lady ’d act as you describe,
But
ev’ry one such prudence don’t imbibe.
THE PEASANT AND HIS ANGRY LORD
Once on a time, as hist’ry’s page relates,
A lord, possessed of many large estates,
Was angry with a poor and humble clod,
Who tilled his grounds and feared his very nod.
Th’ offence (as often happens) was but small,
But on him, vowed the peer, his rage should fall—
Said he, a halter, rascal, you deserve;
You’ll never from the gallows-turnpike swerve:
Or, soon or late you swinging will be found
Who, born for hanging, ever yet was drowned?
Howe’er you’ll smile to hear my lenient voice;
Observe, three punishments await your choice;
Take which you will.—The first is, you shall eat,
Of strongest garlick, thirty heads complete;
No drink you’ll have between, nor sleep, nor rest;
You know a breach of promise I detest.
Or, on your shoulders further I propose,
To give you, with a cudgel, thirty blows.
Or, if more pleasing, that you truly pay,
The sum of thirty pounds without delay.
Thepeasant ’gan to turn things in his mind:—
Said
he, to take the heads I’m not inclined;
No
drink, you say, between; that makes it worse;
To
eat the garlick thus, would prove a curse.
Nor
can I suffer on my tender back,
That,
with a cudgel, thirty blows you thwack.
Still
harder thirty pounds to pay appeared;
Uncertain
how to act, he hanging feared.
The
noble peer he begged, upon his knees,
His
penitence to hear, and sentence ease.
But
mercy dwelled not with the angry lord
Is
this, cried he, the answer?—bring a cord.
The
peasant, trembling lest his life was sought;
The
garlick chose, which presently was brought.
Upon a dish my lord the number told; Clod no way liked the garlick to behold. With piteous mien the garlick head he took, Then on it num’rous ways was led to look, And grumbling much, began to spit and eat, just like a cat with mustard on her meat, To touch it with his tongue he durst not do; He knew not how to act or what pursue. The peer, delighted at the man’s distress, The garlick made him bite, and chew, and press, Then gulp it down as if delicious fare; The first he passed; the second made him swear; The third he found was every whit as sad, He wished the devil had it, ’twas so bad. In short, when at the twelfth our wight arrived, He thought his mouth and throat of skin deprived. Said he, some drink I earnestly intreat; What, Greg’ry, cried my lord, dost feel a heat; In thy repasts dost love to wet thy jaws? Well! well! I won’t object; thou know’st my laws; Much good may’t do thee; here, some wine, some wine! Yet recollect, to drink, since you design, That afterward, my friend, you’ll have to choose The thirty blows, or thirty pounds to lose. But, cried the peasant, I sincerely pray, Your lordship’s goodness,Page 3
that the garlick may Be taken in the account, for as to pelf, Where can an humble lab’rer, like myself, Expect the sum of thirty pounds to seize? Then, said the peer, be cudgelled if you please; Take thirty thwacks; for naught the garlick goes. To moisten well his throat, and ease his woes, The peasant drank a copious draught of wine, And then to bear the cudgel would resign.
A
Single blow he patiently endured;
The
second, howsoe’er, his patience cured;
The
third was more severe, and each was worse;
The
punishment he now began to curse;
Two
lusty wights, with cudgels thrashed his back
And
regularly gave him thwack and thwack;
He
cried, he roared, for grace he begged his lord,
Who
marked each blow, and would no ease accord;
But
carefully observed, from time to time,
That
lenity he always thought sublime;
His
gravity preserved; considered too
The
blows received and what continued due.
Atlength, when Greg’ry twenty strokes had got,
He
piteously exclaimed:—if more’s my
lot
I
never shall survive! Oh! pray forgive,
If
you desire, my lord, that I should live.
Then
down with thirty pounds, replied the peer,
Since
you the blows so much pretend to fear;
I’m
sorry for you; but if all the gold
Be
not prepared, your godfather, I’m told,
Can
lend a part; yet, since so far you’ve been,
To
flinch the rest you surely won’t be seen.
Thewretched peasant to his lordship flew,
And
trembling cried—’tis up! the number
view!
A
scrutiny was made, which nothing gained;
No
choice but pay the money now remained;
This
grieved him much, and o’er the fellow’s
face;
The
dewy drops were seen to flow apace.
All
useless proved:—the full demand he sent,
With
which the peer expressed himself content.
Unlucky
he whoe’er his lord offends!
To
golden ore, howe’er, the proud man bends:
’Twasvain that Gregory a pardon prayed;
For
trivial faults the peasant dearly paid;
His
throat enflamed—his tender back well beat—
His
money gone—and all to make complete,
Without
the least deduction for the pain,
The
blows and garlick gave the trembling swain.
Who, born for hanging, ever yet was drowned?
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