And then the sham lady proceeded in the same mincing voice as before:-

“Well!—­dear me, I’m quite put out.  But however, you see—­what was to be done, that was the thing.  It wanted only half an hour to dinner-time, and there was the meat roasting away by itself, and the potatoe-pan boiling over.  You never heard such a fizzling as it made in your life—­in short, everything was in a mess, and there was no cook.

“Well!  I basted the meat for a few minutes, took the potatoe-pan off the fire, and then ran up-stairs to put on my bonnet.  Thought I, the best thing I can do is to send somebody for the policeman, and let him find the cook.  But while I was tying the strings of my bonnet, I fancied I heard a mysterious noise coming out of the bottom drawer of my wardrobe.  Fancy that, ma’am, with my nerves in such a state from the cook being lost!”

No. 5 paused, and looked round for sympathy, which was most freely given by the other ladies, in the shape of sighs and exclamations.

“The drawer was a very deep drawer, ma’am, so I thought perhaps the cat had crept in,” continued No. 5.  “Well, I went to it to see, and there it was, partly open, with a cotton gown in it that didn’t belong to me.  Imagine my feelings at that, ma’am!  So I pulled at the handles to get the drawer quite open, but it wouldn’t come, it was as heavy as lead.  It was really very alarming—­one doesn’t like such odd things happening—­but at last I got it open, though I tumbled backwards as I did so; and what do you think, ma’am—­ladies—­ what do you think was in it?”

“The cook!” shrieked No. 4, convulsed with laughter; and the whole party clapped their hands and roared applause.

“The cook, ma’am, actually the cook!” pursued No. 5, “one of the fattest, most POONCHY little women you ever saw.  And what do you think was the history of it?  I kept my up-stairs Pickwick in the corner of that bottom drawer.  She had seen it there that very morning, when she was helping to dust the room, and took the opportunity of a spare half-hour to slip up and rest herself by reading it in the drawer.  Unluckily, however, she had fallen asleep, and when I got the drawer out, there she lay, and I actually heard her snore.  A shocking thing this education, ma’am, you see, and teaching people to read.  All the cooks in the country are spoilt!”

Peals of laughter greeted this wonderfully witty concoction of No. 5’s, and the lemon-coloured tea and biscuits were partaken of during the pause which followed.

Aunt Judy meanwhile, who had been quite unable to resist joining in the laugh herself, was seated on the floor, behind the open door of the wardrobe, thinking to herself of certain passages in Wordsworth’s most beautiful ode, in which he has described the play of children,

“As if their whole vocation
Were endless imitation.”

Truly they had got hold here of strange