The Belton Estate eBook

Clara stood at the door watching the gig till it was out of sight watching it as well as her tears would allow.  What a grand cousin he was!  Had it not been a pity a thousand pities that that grievous episode should have come to mar the brotherly love, the sisterly confidence, which might otherwise have been so perfect between them?  But perhaps it might all be well yet.  Clara knew, or thought that she knew, that men and women differed in their appreciation of love.  She, having once loved, could not change.  Of that she was sure.  Her love might be fortunate or unfortunate.  It might be returned, or it might simply be her own, to destroy all hope of happiness for her on earth.  But whether it were this or that, whether productive of good or evil, the love itself could not be changed.  But with men she thought it might be different.  Her cousin, doubtless, had been sincere in the full sincerity of his heart when he made his offer.  And had she accepted it had she been able to accept it she believed that he would have loved her truly and constantly.  Such was his nature.  But she also believed that love with him, unrequited love, would have no enduring effect, and that he had already resolved, with equal courage and wisdom, to tread this short-lived passion out beneath his feet.  One night had sufficed to him for that treading out.  As she thought of this the tears ran plentifully down her cheek; and going again to her room she remained there crying till it was time for her to wipe away the marks of her weeping, that she might go to her father.

But she was very glad that Will bore it so well very glad!  Her cousin was safe against love-making once again.

CHAPTER VII

MISS AMEDROZ GOES TO PERIVALE

It had been settled for some time past that Miss Amedroz was to go to Perivale for a few days in November.  Indeed it seemed to be a recognized fact in her life that she was to make the journey from Belton to Perivale and back very often, as there prevailed an idea that she owed a divided duty.  This was in some degree hard upon her, as she had very little gratification in these visits to her aunt.  Had there been any intention on the part of Mrs Winterfield to provide for her, the thing would have been intelligible according to the usual arrangements which are made in the world on such matters; but Mrs Winterfield had scarcely a right to call upon her niece for dutiful attendance after having settled it with her own conscience that her property was all to go to her nephew.  But Clara entertained no thought of rebelling, and had agreed to make the accustomed journey in November, travelling then, as she did on all such journeys, at her aunt’s expense.

Two things only occurred to disturb her tranquillity before she went, and they were not of much violence.  Mr Wright, the clergyman, called at Belton Castle, and in the course of conversation with Mr Amedroz renewed one of those ill-natured rumours which had before been spread about Mrs Askerton.  Clara did not see him, but she heard an account of it all from her father.