“Duncan! my own Duncan!” ejaculated the major, his broad face flushed with joy. The animal raised his snout, gave a significant grunt, and ceasing his caressings, ran to his master, a double curl in his tail. Having got possession of his property, the major returned thanks within himself, invoked a blessing on the head of the parson, whom he cursed in his heart, and set out for home, followed by his pig and a score of mischievous boys, making the very air resound with their hootings.
Which treats of what was done with the pig; and also of the lecture on Crabbe, by Giles Sheridan, and various things.
When Major Roger Potter reached his home, he found his wife Polly waiting with eager desire to see the animal he had so vividly described. “Pray to God, dear Polly,” said he, embracing and kissing his wife, as the mischievous boys set up a loud yell, “for our pig is safe, and in him there is a fortune, which you shall share, and he comforted.” And having consigned the animal to the care of his wife, who, although a strong minded woman in her way, looked at first with no little distrust on the animal, but became favorably impressed on seeing him cut certain curious capers round the room. Indeed she soon began to congratulate herself on the possession of so rare a creature, and to invoke certain ills on the head of the parson for holding him so tight in his fingers. “Peace, dear Polly,” enjoined the major, “for goodness belongs to our kind. The nonresistant was right, (and right should have its right,) when he advised me to use goodness as the most effectual weapon to demolish an adversary. It becomes me, as it does all good christians, to reverence and adore the Church; but I own it is not in me to reverence those priests and deacons who affect to regale your palate with truth, while splitting God’s goodness into fragments, merely to please those who have a terrible thirst to get to heaven over a road no one else travels.”
“As to that, my dear husband,” responded the earnest woman, “I cannot be a judge. But a major as famous as yourself, should be careful how he mixes glory with his profanity; lest the public, whose servant he is, set it down against him, and use it to his injury on election day.”