“And now, your excellency, if these qualifications be not enough, pray remember that I have as many more in store.  Be not timorous in the matter, but ponder well over my claims to your consideration; and if it please you to grant my prayer, I will accept the boon with as many thanks as you may demand.  “Your Excellency’s Humble Servant, “General Roger Sherman Potter.”

“Heavens, sir!” exclaimed the accommodating Mr. Stretcher, as the general read to him what he had prepared, “but you have left the perfecting of this business to me.  Let me beseech you, then, not to dispatch such a letter, for I am not the man to question your abilities; but having got the matter in train, you must not knock the fruit down before it is ripe.  Here your honor will find a document in every way suited to the purpose.”  Mr. Stretcher here produced a ponderous paper, wherein every speech made by the general was carefully referred to, and also no end of political achievements set down to his credit; such, in fine, as would have defied the skill of a dozen politicians of such inferior calibre as Clay and Webster.  The general seemed a little chary of this big document, and took it in his fingers somewhat reluctantly.  And as he did so, Mr. Tickler, who until then had remained silent, spoke up and said, “By my faith, gentlemen, had the matter been left to me, they should have had proof of my knowledge of Latin in the sentences, for I have heard it said that Secretaries of State are fond of it.  But I will smoke my cigar and leave the rest to you.”

“As for your Latin, friend Tickler,” replied the general, affecting to read the ponderous document Stretcher was waiting in great anxiety for a verdict upon, “we will say no more about that, for it occurs to me you made it do good service at the New York Hotel.”  This so put the matter at rest with Mr. Tickler that he held his peace and smoked his cigar.  “Upon my word, sir,” resumed the general, addressing himself to Mr. Stretcher, “it will be a perilous adventure to send so ponderous a document to the State Department when business is pressing and time precious.  Being a timid man, the secretary will lay it over for to-morrow, and to-morrow he will think no more of it.  But suppose we compromise this matter, Mr. Stretcher.  Let both documents be sent, and if one have virtue, surely two cannot fail to effect our object.”

“Surely, general, you are blind to your own interests, and respect not my reputation,” replied Mr. Stretcher, going right into a passion, and so far forgetting what belonged to good manners as to say he verily believed the general a trifling simpleton, who was resolved on making an ass of himself in the eyes of the administration, as well as doing him (Stretcher) out of the pay for his services.  And this so excited the ire of the general, who was scrupulous of his honor, as well as vain of his good understanding, that he forthwith proceeded to take down his sword,