Mark Twain, a Biography. Complete eBook

Albert Bigelow Paine
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,890 pages of information about Mark Twain, a Biography. Complete.

Mark Twain, a Biography. Complete eBook

Albert Bigelow Paine
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,890 pages of information about Mark Twain, a Biography. Complete.

“No,” he said, “the American sense of humor would have laughed it out of court in a week; and the Frenchman dreads ridicule, too, though he never seems to realize how ridiculous he is—­the most ridiculous creature in the world.”

On the morning of his seventy-fourth birthday he was looking wonderfully well after a night of sound sleep, his face full of color and freshness, his eyes bright and keen and full of good-humor.  I presented him with a pair of cuff-buttons silver-enameled with the Bermuda lily, and I thought he seemed pleased with them.

It was rather gloomy outside, so we remained indoors by the fire and played cards, game after game of hearts, at which he excelled, and he was usually kept happy by winning.  There were no visitors, and after dinner Helen asked him to read some of her favorite episodes from Tom Sawyer, so he read the whitewashing scene, Peter and the Pain-killer, and such chapters until tea-time.  Then there was a birthday cake, and afterward cigars and talk and a quiet fireside evening.

Once, in the course of his talk, he forgot a word and denounced his poor memory: 

“I’ll forget the Lord’s middle name some time,” he declared, “right in the midst of a storm, when I need all the help I can get.”

Later he said: 

“Nobody dreamed, seventy-four years ago to-day, that I would be in Bermuda now.”  And I thought he meant a good deal more than the words conveyed.

It was during this Bermuda visit that Mark Twain added the finishing paragraph to his article, “The Turning-Point in My Life,” which, at Howells’s suggestion, he had been preparing for Harper’s Bazar.  It was a characteristic touch, and, as the last summary of his philosophy of human life, may be repeated here.

Necessarily the scene of the real turning-point of my life (and of yours) was the Garden of Eden.  It was there that the first link was forged of the chain that was ultimately to lead to the emptying of me into the literary guild.  Adam’s temperament was the first command the Deity ever issued to a human being on this planet.  And it was the only command Adam would never be able to disobey.  It said, “Be weak, be water, be characterless, be cheaply persuadable.”  The later command, to let the fruit alone, was certain to be disobeyed.  Not by Adam himself, but by his temperament—­which he did not create and had no authority over.  For the temperament is the man; the thing tricked out with clothes and named Man is merely its Shadow, nothing more.  The law of the tiger’s temperament is, Thou shaft kill; the law of the sheep’s temperament is, Thou shalt not kill.  To issue later commands requiring the tiger to let the fat stranger alone, and requiring the sheep to imbrue its hands in the blood of the lion is not worth while, for those commands can’t be obeyed.  They would invite to violations of the law of temperament, which is supreme, and takes precedence of all other authorities. 
Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
Mark Twain, a Biography. Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.