Mark Twain, a Biography — Volume II, Part 2: 1886-1900 eBook

Albert Bigelow Paine
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 310 pages of information about Mark Twain, a Biography — Volume II, Part 2.

Mark Twain, a Biography — Volume II, Part 2: 1886-1900 eBook

Albert Bigelow Paine
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 310 pages of information about Mark Twain, a Biography — Volume II, Part 2.

“Don’t feel at all that you need to do it.  I know just how you are feeling, how worried you are.”

Clemens answered, “Mr. Rogers, do you think there is anything I could do for you that I wouldn’t do?”

It was on this occasion that he told for the first time the “stolen watermelon” story, so often reprinted since; how once he had stolen a watermelon, and when he found it to be a green one, had returned it to the farmer, with a lecture on honesty, and received a ripe one in its place.

In spite of his cares and diversions Clemens’s literary activities of this time were considerable.  He wrote an article for the Youth’s Companion—­“How to Tell a Story”—­and another for the North American Review on Fenimore Cooper’s “Literary Offenses.”  Mark Twain had not much respect for Cooper as a literary artist.  Cooper’s stilted artificialities and slipshod English exasperated him and made it hard for him to see that in spite of these things the author of the Deerslayer was a mighty story-teller.  Clemens had also promised some stories to Walker, of the Cosmopolitan, and gave him one for his Christmas number, “Traveling with a Reformer,” which had grown out of some incidents of that long-ago journey with Osgood to Chicago, supplemented by others that had happened on the more recent visit to that city with Hall.  This story had already appeared when Clemens and Rogers had made their Chicago trip.  Rogers had written for passes over the Pennsylvania road, and the president, replying, said: 

“No, I won’t give Mark Twain a pass over our road.  I’ve been reading his ‘Traveling with a Reformer,’ in which he abuses our road.  I wouldn’t let him ride over it again if I could help it.  The only way I’ll agree to let him go over it at all is in my private car.  I have stocked it with everything he can possibly want, and have given orders that if there is anything else he wants the train is to be stopped until they can get it.”

“Pudd’nhead Wilson” was appearing in the Century during this period, and “Tom Sawyer Abroad” in the St. Nicholas.  The Century had issued a tiny calendar of the Pudd’nhead maxims, and these quaint bits of philosophy, the very gems of Mark Twain mental riches, were in everybody’s mouth.  With all this going on, and with his appearance at various social events, he was rather a more spectacular figure that winter than ever before.

From the note-book: 

    The Haunted Looking-glass.  The guest (at midnight a dim light
    burning) wakes up & sees appear & disappear the faces that have
    looked into the glass during 3 centuries.

    Love seems the swiftest but is the slowest of all growths.  No man
    and woman really know what perfect love is until they have been
    married a quarter of a century.

    It is more trouble to make a maxim than it is to do right.

    Of all God’s creatures, there is only one that cannot be made the
    slave of the lash—­that one is the cat.

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Project Gutenberg
Mark Twain, a Biography — Volume II, Part 2: 1886-1900 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.