Could I reconcile myself to seclusion so entire?  Would not this weight of utter silence grow heavier than I could bear?  It was not always June, I told myself, and there were days of lashing rain, grey skies, and ‘death-dumb autumn dripping’ fog to think of.  The vision of lighted streets and bustling crowds, the warm contiguity of numbers, the long lines of windows all aglow at evening, the genial stir and tumult of congregated life, took masterful possession of my mind.  Could I bear to relinquish the familiar scene?  A thousand threads of use and habit bound me to it, each in itself as light as gossamer, but the whole tough as cords of steel.  I foresaw that I had underestimated the ease of my deliverance.  It would require a strength of consistent resolution of which perhaps I was not capable.  It was but too likely that I should be one of those who put their hand to the plough and look back, a reluctant recruit of a cause that won my faith, but could not win my will.  This would be not only fatal to my peace, it would make me despicable in my own eyes, which is the worst of all calamities that man can suffer.

Such a distress of mind was natural; yet I think that behind it all my thought was firm and clear.  What I had proposed to do for twenty years I must do, or attempt to do, if I would retain my self-respect.  I might become despicable to myself by failure in my task, but I should be much more despicable by never trying to accomplish it.  In that half-hour of meditation the die was cast.  I had come to my predestined battlefield.  I must here be triumphant or defeated; in any case I must attempt the conflict.

The decision restored, as by a stroke of magic, all my good spirits.  I examined my two cottages again with an eye less critical, more kindly, more urbane.  I saw with how few touches they could be transformed into a habitation suited to my needs.  With the two main rooms thrown into one I should have a spacious living-room; the two gardens would compose an admirable lawn; roses should grow against the walls, warm-hued creepers frame the upper windows; it should become a lodge in Eden.  Then there was the air, the view, the company of the silent mountains and the singing stream.  Here was my theatre, my orchestra, my concert-room.  The woman who was my guide took me into her own cottage for a cup of tea, and I was struck with its homely air of comfort.  An oak dresser, covered with blue ware such as is common in these parts, filled one wall; an oak chest of drawers another; there was a broad-seated oak settle by the fire; all solid, of a good design, and polished to a deep brown by use and industry.  The floor was red brick; flowers lined the windows; and everything was clean as hands could make it.  I saw my house furnished on the same plan, and it pleased me.  A recollection crossed my mind, curious and most fantastic at such a time, of a certain room in one of the show-houses in London, furnished entirely in