Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.

[Illustration:  A STRONG ATTACHMENT.]

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THE LORD MAYOR’S FOOL.

We are happy in being able to announce that it is the intention of the new potentate of Guildhall to revive the ancient and honourable office of “Lord Mayor’s Fool.”  A number of candidates have already offered themselves, whose qualifications for the situation are so equally balanced, that it is a matter of no small difficulty to decide amongst them.  The Light of the City has, we understand, called in Gog and Magog—­Sir Peter Laurie and Alderman Humphrey—­to assist him in selecting a fit and proper person upon whom to bestow the Civic cap and bells.

The following is a list of the individuals whose claims are under consideration:—­

The Marquis of Londonderry, who founds his claims upon the fact of his always creating immense laughter whenever he opens his mouth.

Lord Brougham, who grounds his pretensions upon the agility displayed by him in his favourite character of “the Political Harlequin.”

Lord Normanby, upon the peculiar fitness of his physiognomy to play the Fool in any Court.

Daniel O’Connell, upon his impudence, and his offer to fool it in his new scarlet gown and cocked-hat.

Peter Borthwick, upon his brilliant wit, which it is intended shall supersede the Bude Light in the House of Commons.

Colonel Sibthorp, upon his jokes, which have convulsed all the readers of PUNCH, including himself.

George Stephens, upon the immense success of his tragedy of “Martinuzzi,” which, to the outrageous merriment of the audience, turned out to be a farce.

T.  Wakley, upon the comical way in which he turns his Cap of Liberty into a Wellington-Wig and back again at the shortest notice.

Sir Francis Burdett, upon the exceeding complacency with which he wears his own fool’s-cap.

Ben D’Israeli, upon his unadulterated simplicity, and the unfurnished state of his attic.

Mr. Muntz, upon the prima facie evidence that he is a near relative of Gog and Magog, and therefore the best entitled to the Civic Foolship.

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PUNCH’S CATECHISM OF GEOGRAPHY.

The astonishing increase of the great metropolis in every direction—­the growing up of Brixton and Clapham—­the discovery of inhabited streets and houses in the terra incognita to the northward of Pentonville—­and the spirit of maritime enterprise which the late successful voyages made by the Bridegroom steam-boat to the coast of Chelsea has excited in the public mind—­has induced a thirst for knowledge, and a desire to be acquainted with the exact geographical position of this habitable world, of which it is admitted Pinnock’s work does not give the remotest idea.  To supply this deficiency, PUNCH begs leave to offer to his friends and readers his Catechism of Geography, which, if received with the extraordinary favour it deserves from the public, may be followed by catechisms on other interesting branches of knowledge.

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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