Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.

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On Thursday, July 8, 1841, the celebrated pack of Knocker Boys met at the Cavendish, in Jermyn Street.  These animals, which have acquired for themselves a celebrity as undying as that of Tom and Jerry, are of a fine powerful breed, and in excellent condition.  The success which invariably attends them must be highly gratifying to the distinguished nobleman who, if he did not introduce this particular species into the metropolis, has at least done much to bring it to its present extraordinary state of perfection.

As there may be some of our readers who are ignorant of the purposes for which this invaluable pack has been organised, it may be as well to state a few particulars, before proceeding to the detail of one of the most splendid nights upon record in the annals of disorderism.

The knocker is a thing which is generally composed of brass or iron.  It has frequently a violent resemblance to the “human face divine,” or the ravenous expressiveness of a beast of prey.  It assumes a variety of phases under peculiar vinous influences.  A gentleman, in whose veracity and experience we have the most unlimited confidence, for a series of years kept an account of the phenomena of his own knocker; and by his permission the following extracts are now submitted to the public:—­


Nov. 12—­Dined with Captain ——.  Capital spread—­exquisite liqueurs—­magnificent wines—­unparalleled cigars—­drank my four bottles—­should have made it five, but found I had eaten something which disagreed with me—­Home at four.

    State of Knocker.—­Jumping up and down the surface of the door
    like a rope dancer, occasionally diverging into a zig-zag, the
    key-hole partaking of the same eccentricities.

Nov. 13.—­Supped with Charley B——.  Brandy, genuine cognac—­Cigars principe.  ESTIMATED CONSUMPTION:  brandy and water, eighteen glasses—­cigars, two dozen—­porter with a cabman, two pots.
State of Knocker.—­Peripatetic—­moved from our house to the next—­remained till it roused the family—­returned to its own door, and became duplicated—­wouldn’t wake the house-porter till five.

    N.B.  Found I had used my own thumb for a sounding-plate, and had
    bruised my nail awfully.

    Nov. 14.—­Devoted the day to soda-water and my tailor’s bill—­gave
    a draught for the amount, and took another on my own account.

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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