Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.
this House requires—­
      No, that’s too complimentary—­desires,
      That Mr. Lawson’s brought upon the floor. 
          The thing was done: 
      The house divided, and the Ayes were—­ONE!

* * * * *

EXPRESS FROM WINDSOR.

Last evening a most diabolical, and, it is to be regretted successful, attempt, was made to kiss the Princess Royal.  It appears that the Royal Babe was taking an airing in the park, reclining in the arms of her principal nurse, and accompanied by several ladies of the court, who were amusing the noble infant by playing rattles, when a man of ferocious appearance emerged from behind some trees, walked deliberately up to the noble group, placed his hands on the nurse, and bent his head over the Princess.  The Honourable Miss Stanley, guessing the ruffian’s intention, earnestly implored him to kiss her instead, in which request she was backed by all the ladies present.[1] He was not, however, to be frustrated in the attempt, which no sooner had he accomplished, than he hurried off amidst the suppressed screams of the ladies.  The Royal Infant was immediately carried to the palace, where her heart-rending cries attracted the attention of her Majesty, who, on hurrying to the child, and hearing the painful narration, would, in the burst of her maternal affection, have kissed the infant, had not Sir J. Clarke, who was fortunately present, prevented her so doing.

    [1] This circumstance alone must at once convince every
        unprejudiced person of the utter falsity of the reports
        (promulgated by certain interested parties) of the disloyalty
        of the Tory ladies, when we see several dames placed in the
        most imminent danger, yet possessing sufficient presence of
        mind to offer lip-service to their sovereign.—­EDITOR. Morn. 
        Post
.

Dr. Locock was sent for from town, who, immediately on his arrival at Windsor, held a conference with Sir J. Clarke, and a basin of pap was prepared by them, which being administered to the Royal Infant, produced the most satisfactory results.

We are prohibited from stating the measures taken for the detection of the ruffian, lest their disclosure should frustrate the ends of justice.

* * * * *

A ROYAL DUCK.

His Royal Highness Prince Albert, during the sojourn of the Court at Windsor Castle, became, by constant practice in the Thames, so expert a swimmer, that, with the help of a cork jacket, he could, like Jones of the celebrated firm of “Brown, Jones, and Robinson,” swim “anywhere over the river.”  Her Majesty, however, with true conjugal regard for the safety of the royal duck, never permitted him to venture into the water without

[Illustration:  A COMPANION OF THE BATH.]

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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