Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.

This commencement softened the hearts of his auditors, who clapped their handkerchiefs to their noses.

“The world,” continued the statue, “may regard me with envy; but I despise the world, particularly the critics who have dared to laugh at me.  (Groans.) The object of my ambition is attained—­I am now the equal and representative of Shakspere—­detraction cannot wither the laurels that shadow my brows—­Finis coronat opus!—­I have done.  To-morrow I retire into private life; but though fortune has made me great, she has not made me proud, and I shall be always happy to shake hands with a friend when I meet him.”

At the conclusion of this pathetic address, loud cheers, mingled with tears and sighs, arose from the audience, one-half of whom sunk into the arms of the other half, and were borne out of the house in a fainting state; and thus terminated this imposing ceremony, which will be long remembered with delight by every lover of

[Illustration:  THE HIGHER WALK OF THE DRAMA.]

* * * * *

A CARD.

TO THE COMMITTEE OF THE DRAMATIC AUTHORS, ENGLISH OPERA HOUSE.

Mr. Levy, of Holywell-street, perceiving that his neighbour JACOB FAITHFUL’S farce, entitled “The Cloak and Bonnet,” has not given general satisfaction, begs respectfully to offer to the notice of the committee, his large and carefully-assorted stock of second-hand wearing apparel, from which he will undertake to supply any number of dramas that may be required, at a moment’s notice.

Mr. L. has at present on hand the following dramatic pieces, which he can strongly recommend to the public:—­

1.  “The Dressing Gown and Slippers.”—­A fashionable comedy, suited for a genteel neighbourhood.

2.  “The Breeches and Gaiters.”—­A domestic drama.  A misfit at the Adelphi.

3.  “The Wig and Wig-box.”—­A broad farce, made to fit little Keeley or anybody else.

4.  “The Smock-frock and Highlows.”—­A tragedy in humble life, with a terrific denouement.

*** The above will be found to be manufactured out of the best materials, and well worthy the attention of those gentlemen who have so nobly come forward to rescue the stage from its present degraded position.

* * * * *

THE MONEY MARKET.

The scarcity of money is frightful.  As much as a hundred per cent., to be paid in advance, has been asked upon bills; but we have not yet heard of any one having given it.  There was an immense run for gold, but no one got any, and the whole of the transactions of the day were done in copper.  An influential party created some sensation by coming into the market late in the afternoon, just before the close of business, with half-a-crown; but it was found, on inquiry, to be a bad one.  It is expected that if the dearth of money continues another week, buttons must be resorted to.  A party, whose transactions are known to be large, succeeded in settling his account with the Bulls, by means of postage-stamps; an arrangement of which the Bears will probably take advantage.

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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