Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.

The dark drab, which harmonises with the mud—­the peculiar pepper-and-salt which is warranted not to grow gray with age—­the indescribable mixtures, which have evidently been compounded for the sake of economy, must ever be exiled from the wardrobe and legs of a gentleman.

The hunting-coat must be invariably of scarlet, due care being taken before wearing to dip the tips of the tails in claret or port wine, which, for new coats, or for those of gentlemen who do not hunt, has been found to give them an equally veteran appearance with the sweat of the horse.

Of the age it is only necessary to state, that a truly fashionable suit should never appear under a week, or be worn longer than a month from the time that it left the hands of its parent schneider.  Shooting-coats are exceptions to the latter part of this rule, as a garment devoted to the field should always bear evidence of long service, and a new jacket should be consigned to your valet, who, if he understands his profession, will carefully rub the shoulders with a hearth-stone and bole-ammonia, to convey the appearance of friction and the deposite of the rust of the gun[1].

    [1] Gentlemen who are theoretical, rather than practical sportsmen,
        would find it beneficial to have a partridge carefully plucked,
        and the feathers sparingly deposited in the pockets of the
        shooting-jacket usually applied to the purposes of carrying
        game.  Newgate Market possesses all the advantages of a
        preserved manor.

Of the cut, ornaments, and pathology of dress, we shall speak next week, for these are equally essential to ensure

[Illustration:  AN INTRODUCTION TO FASHIONABLE SOCIETY.]

* * * * *

BEGINNING EARLY.

We are informed by the Times of Saturday, that at the late Conservative enactment at D.L., not only his Royal Highness Prince Albert, but the infant Princess Royal, was “drunk, with the usual honours.”—­[Proh pudor!—­PUNCH.]

* * * * *

SIBTHORP’S VERY BEST.

Sibthorp, meeting Peel in the House of Commons, after congratulating him on his present enviable position, finished the confab with the following unrivalled conundrum:—­“By the bye, which of your vegetables does your Tamworth speech resemble!”—­“Spinach,” replied Peel, who, no doubt, associated it with gammon.—­“Pshaw,” said the gallant Colonel, “your rope inions (your opinions), to be sure!” Peel opened his mouth, and never closed it till he took his seat at the table.

* * * * *

BEAUTIFUL COINCIDENCE!—­A PAIR OF TOOLS.

Sir Francis Burdett, the superannuated Tory tool, proposed the Conservative healths; and Toole the second, as toast-master, announced them to the assemblage.

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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