Elster's Folly eBook

Ellen Wood (author)
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 575 pages of information about Elster's Folly.

Elster's Folly eBook

Ellen Wood (author)
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 575 pages of information about Elster's Folly.

“Ailing.  But it’s an ailing I do not like.”

“What’s the cause?” he rejoined, feeling as if some other crime were about to be brought home to him.

“That’s a question I never inquire into.  I put it upon the air of the Rectory,” added the surgeon in jesting tones, “and tell them they ought to go away for a time, but they have been away too much of late, they say.  She’s getting over it somewhat, and I take care that she goes out and takes exercise.  What has it been?  Well, a sort of inward fever, with flushed cheeks and unequal spirits.  It takes time for these things to be got over, you know.  The Rector has been anything but well, too; he is not the strong, healthy man he was.”

“And all my work; my work!” cried Hartledon to himself, almost gnashing his teeth as he went back down the street.  “What right had I to upset the happiness of that family?  I wish it had pleased God to take me first!  My father used to say that some men seem born into the world only to be a blight to it; it’s what I have been, Heaven knows.”

He knew only too well that Anne Ashton was suffering from the shock caused by his conduct.  The love of these quiet, sensitive, refined natures, once awakened, is not given for a day, but for all time; it becomes a part of existence; and cannot be riven except by an effort that brings destruction to even future hope of happiness.  Not even Mr. Hillary, not even Dr. and Mrs. Ashton, could discern the utter misery that was Anne’s daily portion.  She strove to conceal it all.  She went about the house cheerfully, wore a smiling face when people were present, dressed well, laughed with their guests, went about the parish to rich and poor, and was altogether gay.  Ah, do you know what it is, this assumption of gaiety when the heart is breaking?—­this dread fear lest those about you should detect the truth?  Have you ever lived with this mask upon your face?—­which can only be thrown off at night in the privacy of your own chamber, when you may abandon yourself to your desolation, and pray heaven to take you or give you increased strength to live and bear?  It may seem a light thing, this state of heart that I am telling you about; but it has killed both men and women, for all that; and killed them in silence.

Anne Ashton had never complained.  She did everything she had been used to doing, was particular about all her duties; but a nervous cough attacked her, and her frame wasted, and her cheek grew hectic.  Try as she would she could not eat:  all she confessed to, when questioned by Mrs. Ashton, was “a pain in her throat;” and Mr. Hillary was called in.  Anne laughed:  there was nothing the matter with her, she said, and her throat was better; she had strained it perhaps.  The doctor was a wise doctor; his professional visits were spent in gossip; and as to medicine, he sent her a tonic, and told her to take it or not as she pleased.  Only time, he said to Mrs. Ashton—­she would be all right in time; the summer heat was making her languid.

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
Elster's Folly from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.