THE COMEDY OF ASSES

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ARGVMENTVM

    ARGUMENT OF THE PLAY

Amanti argento filio auxiliarier Sub imperio vivens volt senex uxorio. Itaque ob asinos relatum pretium Saureae Numerari iussit servolo Leonidae. Ad amicam id fertur. cedit noctem filius. Rivalis amens ob praereptam mulierem, Is rem omnem uxori per parasitum nuntiat. Accurrit uxor ac virum e lustris rapit.

An old gentleman, whose wife is the head of the household, desires to give his son financial support in a love affair.  He therefore had some money, brought to Saurea in payment for some asses, counted out to a certain rascally servant of his own, Leonida.  This money goes to the young fellow’s mistress, and he concedes his father an evening with her.  A rival of his, beside himself at being deprived of the girl, sends word, by a parasite, to the old gentleman’s wife, of the whole matter.  In rushes the wife and drags her husband from the house of vice.

PERSONAE

    DRAMATIS PERSONAE

  LIBANVS SERVVS
  DEMAENETVS SENEX
  ARGYRIPPVS ADVLESCENS
  CLEARETA LENA
  LEONIDA SERVVS
  MERCATOR
  PHILAENIVM MERETRIX
  DIABOLVS ADVLESCENS
  PARASITVS
  ARTEMONA MATRONA

      LIBANUS, slave of Demaenetus. 
      DEMAENETUS, an old gentleman of Athens. 
      ARGYRIPPUS, his son. 
      CLEARETA, a procuress. 
      LEONIDA, slave of Demaenetus. 
      A TRADER. 
      PHILAENIUM, a courtesan, daughter of Cleareta. 
      DIABOLUS, a young gentleman of Athens. 
      A PARASITE. 
      ARTEMONA, wife of Demaenetus.

    Scene:—­Athens.  A street running in front of the houses
    of Demaenetus and Cleareta:  between the houses is a narrow
    lane.

PROLOGVS

PROLOGUE

Hoc agite sultis, spectatores, nunciam, quae quidem mihi atque vobis res vertat bene gregique huic et dominis atque conductoribus. face nunciam tu, praeco, omnem auritum poplum.

Kindly give us your entire attention now, spectators:  I heartily hope it will result in benefit to me, also to you, and to this company and its managers, and to those that hire them. (turning to a herald) Herald, provide all this crowd with ears at once. (the herald proclaims silence)

age nunc reside, cave modo ne gratiis. nunc quid processerim huc et quid mihi voluerim dicam:  ut sciretis nomen huius fabulae; nam quod ad argumentum attinet, sane brevest.

Enough enough!  Sit down—­and be sure you put that in your bill! (to audience) Now I shall say why I have come out before you