An’ she’s the funniest Ma!  ’Cause when
    My Doll won’t mind, an’ I ist cry,
    W’y, nen my Ma she sob an’ sigh,
    An’ say, “Dear Good little girl, good-bye!—­
  Bad little girl’s comed here again!”

  Last time ‘at Ma act’ thataway,
    I cried all to myse’f awhile
    Out on the steps, an’ nen I smile,
    An’ git my Doll all fix’ in style,
  An’ go in where Ma’s at, an’ say: 
    "Morning to you, Mommy dear!
    Where’s that Bad little girl wuz here?
    Bad little girl’s goned clean away,
    An’ Good little girl’s comed back to stay."

[Illustration]

* * * * *

A GUSTATORY ACHIEVEMENT

  Last Thanksgivin’-dinner we
  Et at Granny’s house, an’ she

[Illustration]

  Had—­ist like she alluz does—­
  Most an’ best pies ever wuz.

  Canned black burry-pie an’ goose
  Burry, squshin’-full o’ juice;
  An’ rozburry—­yes, an’ plum—­
  Yes, an’ churry-pie—­um-yum!

  Peach an’ punkin, too, you bet. 
  Lawzy!  I kin taste ’em yet! 
  Yes, an’ custard-pie, an’ mince!

* * * * *

  An’—­I—­ain’t—­et—­no—­pie—­since!

[Illustration]

* * * * *

CLIMATIC SORCERY

  When frost’s all on our winder, an’ the snow’s
  All out-o’-doors, our “Old-Kriss"-milkman goes
  A-drivin’ round, ist purt’-nigh froze to death,
  With his old white mustache froze full o’ breath.

  But when it’s summer an’ all warm ag’in,
  He comes a-whistlin’ an’ a-drivin in
  Our alley, ’thout no coat on, ner ain’t cold,
  Ner his mustache ain’t white, ner he ain’t old.

[Illustration]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “OUR ’OLD-KRISS’-MILKMAN.”]

* * * * *

A PARENT REPRIMANDED

  Sometimes I think ’at Parents does
  Things ist about as bad as us—­

[Illustration]

    Wite ’fore our vurry eyes, at that! 
  Fer one time Pa he scold’ my Ma
    ’Cause he can’t find his hat;
  An’ she ist cried, she did!  An’ I
    Says, “Ef you scold my Ma
  Ever again an’ make her cry,
    Wy, you sha’n’t be my Pa!”
  An’ nen he laugh’ an’ find his hat
  Ist wite where Ma she said it’s at!

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “THE CHILDISH DREAMS IN HIS WISE OLD HEAD.”]

* * * * *

THE TREASURE OF THE WISE MAN