One day there was grief in the crew,
For they hadn’t a morsel of meat,
And Borria Bungalee Boo
Was dying for something to eat—
“Come provide me with something to eat!”
“Alack-a-Dey, famished I feel;
Oh, good little Tootle-Tum-Teh,
Where on earth shall I look for a meal?
For I haven’t no dinner to-day!—
Not a morsel of dinner to-day!
“Dear Tootle-Tum, what shall we
Come, get us a meal, or in truth,
If you don’t we shall have to eat you,
Oh, adorable friend of our youth!
Thou beloved little friend of our youth!”
And he answered, “Oh Bungalee Boo,
For a moment I hope you will wait—
Is the queen of a neighboring state—
A remarkably neighboring state.
She would pickle deliciously cold—
And her four pretty Amazons, too,
Are enticing, and not very old—
Twenty-seven is not very old.
“There is neat little Titty-Fol-Leh,
There is rollicking Tral-the-Ral-Lah,
There is jocular Waggety-Weh.
There is musical Doh-Reh-Mi-Fah—
There’s the nightingale Doh-Reh-Mi-Fah!”
So the forces of Bungalee Boo
Marched forth in a terrible row,
And the ladies who fought for Queen Loo
Prepared to encounter the foe—
This dreadful insatiate foe!
But they sharpened no weapons at all,
And they poisoned no arrows—not they!
They made ready to conquer or fall
In a totally different way—
An entirely different way.
With a crimson and pearly-white dye
They endeavored to make themselves fair,
With black they encircled each eye,
And with yellow they painted their hair
(It was wool, but they thought it was hair).
And the forces they met in the field—
And the men of King Borria said,
“Amazonians, immediately yield!”
And their arrows they drew to the head,
Yes, drew them right up to the head.
But jocular Waggety-Weh,
Ogled Doodle-Dum-Deh (which was wrong)
And neat little Titty-Fol-Leh,
Said, “Tootle-Tum, you go along!
You naughty old dear, go along!”
And rollicking Tral-the-Ral-Lah
Tapped Alack-a-Dey-Ah with her fan;
And musical Doh-Reh-Mi-Fah,
Said “Pish, go away, you bad man!
Go away, you delightful young man!”
And the Amazons simpered and sighed,
And they ogled, and giggled, and flushed,
And they opened their pretty eyes wide,
And they chuckled, and flirted, and blushed
(At least, if they could, they’d have blushed).
But haughty Pish-Tush-Pooh-Bah
Said, “Alack-a-Dey, what does this mean?”
And despairing Alack-a-Dey-Ah
Said, “They think us uncommonly green,
Ha! ha! most uncommonly green!”