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Augustus Harris
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 114 pages of information about If Only etc..

ROSALINE.

Not much.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Ah, that shows your profound ignorance of the School.  It promises to be a superb example. (Contemplates it sideways.) Exquisite!

ROSALINE.

I say, where is your friend?

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Who?

ROSALINE.

Didn’t you say this studio belonged to a friend of yours?

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Oh yes; he hasn’t come yet.  I expect he will be here this afternoon.

ROSALINE.

What’s this? (picking up Mandarin’s Wig.) One of his props?

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

That?  That is a Mandarin’s wig.  Yes, of course it is one of his props. 
He has just been engaged on a great work:  “The Decapitation of a
Mandarin after a Chinese Reverse.”  The gentleman who sat for the
Mandarin wore that wig.

ROSALINE.

What a funny subject to choose.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Rather playful, isn’t it?  He likes ’em like that.  That’s his forte.

ROSALINE.

What is his name—­do I know him?

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Charlie Sylvester; and a rattling good chap he is, let me tell you.

ROSALINE (with a shriek).

Oh, my heart!  This is fate!

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (alarmed.)

I beg your pardon?  Don’t go off like that.  What’s the matter?

ROSALINE.

It is He—­He who—!  Oh, I am going to faint.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

No,—­no, for goodness’ sake, don’t do that.  What do you mean by “he?”
Here, I say, compose yourself.

ROSALINE.

It is the man I love.  The finger of Fate is in it.  Where is he?  Bring him to me!  Charlie, my own!

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (very flustered).

Oh I say—­look here, you know—? (Aside.) This is the devil and all—­Charlie will never forgive me! (Aloud.) My dear good girl, he isn’t your “own,” I assure you he isn’t.  There is a Mrs. Sylvester, as you know very well. (Aside.) If he comes in and finds her here, there’s an end of all my sittings.  What a piece of infernal luck to be sure!

ROSALINE (resolutely).

Where is he?

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (sullenly).

I don’t know—­I suppose he is at home.

ROSALINE.

Fetch him then—­let me see his dear face again.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

What???

ROSALINE.

Bring him to me—­now, this instant!  We have been divided too long already.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

You have, have you?

ROSALINE.

Far, far too long.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (aside).

I must humour her. (Aloud.) Well, perhaps you have, on second thoughts.  Yes, it is a long time.

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