If Only etc. eBook

Augustus Harris
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 114 pages of information about If Only etc..

GROGGINS.

I can’t help whether he’s painting or not, marm.  The question is whether he is paying or not.

MRS. TEMPENNY.

Man, my husband cannot be disturbed.  Don’t you see?—­he is inspired.

GROGGINS.

Well, he’ll be in—­Wandsworth if he don’t part.

MRS. TEMPENNY.

Sh! talk softly.  Your voice will jar upon him.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (aside).

Now for it. (At window.) One—­two—­three—­I don’t like the look of that glass-house much.

(Hesitates).

GROGGINS (decisively).

I must come in, marm—­out of the way if you please.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY (aside).

Oh!  It’s now or never.

(Jumps out.  A tremendous crash of broken glass is heard.)

MRS. TEMPENNY (with a shriek).

Ah!

GROGGINS (pushing her aside).

What’s that? (Aside.) Oh, there he is. (Aloud.) Here you Mr. Tempenny, sir, I’ve a warrant ’ere on a judgment summons.—­Suit of Cole the butcher. (Addressing lay-figure.) Do you pay up, or come along o’ me?

MRS. TEMPENNY (at window—­aside).

He’s picked himself up—­he waves his hand—­all is well.

GROGGINS.

Which is it, sir?  I allus likes to do business pleasant, only you must make up your mind, you know.  Pay up, or lock up—­take your choice.

MRS. TEMPENNY.

(At window.  Excitedly aside.) He disappears—­he’s lost to view—­the danger’s past.

GROGGINS.

Well, if you won’t speak, you won’t, of course!  I’ve done my ’umble best to do my dooty affable, and since you’re sulky, why—­(Going up to lay-figure) Mr. Rembrandt Tempenny, I’ve a warrant for your arrest.

(He slaps the lay-figure on the shoulder, it collapses with a crash).

GROGGINS (falling back in terror).

Got ’em again, as I’m a sinner!

(MRS. TEMPENNY runs to D.F. as if to go.  ROSALINE half opens R.D. and pops her head out with an ejaculation.)

Act drop, quick.

ACT II.

SCENE:—­SYLVESTER’S Studio. (The next day.) Doors R. and L. At back cupboard.  TEMPENNY discovered painting, ROSALINE posed.

ROSALINE.

I’m getting tired.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Sh! (goes on working frenziedly).

ROSALINE.

I say I’m getting tired.

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

Wait a minute, and you shall rest.  There! now you can move if you like.

ROSALINE (stretching herself).

Thank goodness.  Let us look! (Looks at canvas.) Oh!

REMBRANDT TEMPENNY.

What do you think of it?

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
If Only etc. from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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