I ceased to be articulate.  Victorine suddenly became radiant.

“We must always be together—­at any rate for the duration of the War, you see.  I eat under my meat and he is over.  In flour and sugar—­oh, how can I confess it?—­I exceed.  He is far, far below his ration.  Apart we are failures; together we are perfect.  We both saw it at once.”

I realised suddenly the inevitability of this mutual bond.

“So marriage is the only thing?” I asked; but I was already conquered.

She assented with a regal air.

As I went away I saw a new and strange beauty in the problem of Food
Shortage.

* * * * *

Songs of food production.

IV.

The Farmer’s Boy (New Style).

  The Hun was set on making us fret
    For lack of food to eat,
  When up there ran a City man
    In gaiters trim and neat—­
  Oh, just tell me if a farm there be
    Where I can get employ,
  To plough and sow for PROTH-er-O,
    And he a farmer’s boy,
    And be a farmer’s boy.

  “In khaki dight my juniors fight—­
    I wish that I could too;
  But since the land’s in need of hands
    There’s work for me to do;
  Though you call me a ‘swell,’ I would labour well—­
    I’m aware it’s not pure joy—­
  To plough and sow for PROTH-er-O
    And be a farmer’s boy,
    And be a farmer’s boy.”

  The farmer quoth, “I be mortal loth,
    But the farm ‘tis goin’ back,
  And I do declare as I can’t a-bear
    Any farming hands to lack;
  So if you’ve got grit and be middlin’ fit
    An’ll larn to cry, ‘Ut hoy!’
  And to plough and sow for PROTH-er-O,
    You shall be a farmer’s boy,
    You shall be a farmer’s boy.”

  Bold farmers all, obey the call
    Of townsfolk game and gay! 
  And you City men put by the pen
    And hear me what I say:—­
  Get straight enrolled with a farmer bold,
    And the Hun you’ll straight annoy,
  If you plough and sow for PROTH-er-O
    And be a farmer’s boy,
    And be a farmer’s boy.

* * * * *

The Sex-Problem Again.

    “For sale.—­A 3-year-old Holstein gentleman cow.”—­Canadian Paper.

* * * * *

    “A Liverpool master carter told the Tribunal that the last ‘substitute’
    sent him for one of his men backed a horse down a tip and landed him in
    an expense of L50.”—­Yorkshire Evening Post.

Many men have lost more by backing a horse on a tip.

* * * * *

A Bare Outlook.

    “THINGS YOU HAVE GOT TO DO WITHOUT. 
    CLOTHES AND FOOD.”—­Daily Sketch.